Sometimes I Like to Eat Raw Potatoes
I hate peeling potatoes!
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In other news:
The other day I attended a hockey game.
I love hockey. I played when I was young and these days if you challenged me to a game of NHL 19, or any year, for that matter; I'd kick your ass. You'd be throwing your controller down by the second period, calling me a cheater, rage quitting, then storming out of the room saying we're not friends anymore while my cat hisses at you for being loud.
So I was sitting there, in the arena.
Eating some fries.
Some of those fries weren't even cooked right through but as you can probably tell by the beginning, this post isn't about potatoes, it's about hockey.
Not even hockey. This post is about me attending a hockey game. Not the hockey game I went to recently where I sat there eating half cooked and soggy fries either. No, this post is about a hockey game I attended many years ago.
Let's go back in time:
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Welcome to the year 2000
Same arena, different game.
Junior league. My friends and I were the same age as those players on the ice.
This was the first time I was old enough to legally drink beer and watch a live sporting event.
We did our best to pretend we knew what we were doing. I didn't know there was a designated area for drinking alcohol.
Well, I knew, I read the sign, but I didn't think I'd get caught drinking beer wherever was most convenient for me, which was a seat near the rink, where my friends were, with their beer.
This post isn't about that jerk who came and took our beers away either.
Nope
It's about those three good looking young ladies sitting about ten rows in front of us.
I remembered them from the high school days. They were always nice but wouldn't speak to me because I was useless back then and couldn't even say hello without getting nervous. For three years I must have prepped myself, daily. Riding the bus to school, thinking in my head, I'm gonna say hi to those chicks today. Never could.
Dammit.
This post isn't about that though. Nope, it's about how, finally, after all these years, I had enough liquid courage in my system to say hello.
But I didn't say hello. We starting flicking pennies at them instead. Gently, of course.
Why pennies? Because I'm not going to waste good popcorn on good looking ladies.
So, anyway, some of these pennies ended up whizzing past their heads and hitting the glass in front of them that surrounds the rink. The blonde one would look around and give everyone the evil eyes when she noticed the pennies; we'd sit there acting innocent, covering our faces, holding in our laughter.
Eventually, we were getting low on pennies, so it was time to up the ante.
I aimed right for that blonde's head.
Bullseye!
She felt that one.
She turned around, instantly. We all knew what to do. Just as fast as she turned around, we all pretended to be glued to the action on the ice. Laughing inside, hysterically, but on the outside, guaranteed we all could have won an award for excellence in acting. Dead serious, best hockey game ever, nothing else matters, those ladies don't even exist.
Then she starts yelling at three young boys sitting in front of us, but behind them, as loud as she probably could.
One of those little guys turned around and pointed at us! Ratted on us!
It was them!
She goes:
Oh bullshit! Those guys sitting up there?! Please! They're older and way more mature than you! They would never do something so stupid! Now grow up or I'll kick your little asses!
Then she turned around, made sure to flick her hair, which looked pretty cool; then plopped her ass back down in her seat.
My friends and I couldn't even speak to each other. She burned us pretty hard and didn't even know it. Made us all feel like immature little brats.
Then one of the little dudes turned around and mouthed the words, "Holy fuck", in slow motion and with big eyes.
We all silently agreed.
Holy fuck, indeed.
Have a nice day!
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Forget all of it and throw money at me! i'm worth it and you will go to heaven
It's time for a dime!
Oops. Sorry! That was a little more than a dime.
You are forgiven my son
Somebody get the !popcorn
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See! This is why I always carry butter around in my pockets! Just in case.
Haha butter in the pockets, nice!😂
Hey Dick Assman pass the butter!
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Haha I could never skate worth a damn so hockey was out of the question for me. I was pretty good at hitting people though so I can certainly see the fun in it.
I can't say that I ever hit a lady with a penny but I flicked a lit cigarette into the back of some girls head by accident at a party once. She walked into its path after I had already let it fly. She was pretty pissed because it toasted a few hairs I am pretty sure it all grew back at some point.
Don't worry, it didn't hit her hard. We were just floating them in there.
CIg butts... Years ago I was a party and this woman offered me an open beer, so whatever, I took it. One sip, a cig butt hit my mouth and I spit beer everywhere. She's like, "I didn't know!" ... ya right...
And if you ran into these girls at a hockey game again...admit it, you'd still throw pennies LOL!
I wonder if any of them became dancers, like those kind of dancers, with the poles and titties; maybe they've grown accustomed to having money thrown at them now.
Ooooh, yeah, then you can throw those dollar coins at them instead, much more satisfying!
We have two dollar coins as well. Isn't that exciting!
I will have to bring pennies instead of dollars if I ever go to a strip club again. I'd like to flick pennies at them and watch them try to sexily put the coins in their underwear strap.
Although the post is not about potatoes, I have a suggestion. Stop peeling them. The nutrition is in the peel anyway. Better yet, don't even cook them. The taste is in the rawness. Enjoy and thank me later.
Raw potatoes are awesome; a great snack. Just eat around the green. That shit can kill you.
Well at least you were not throwing soggy potatoes! LOL You certainly gave pennies for their thoughts! LOL. Did you ever run into them again?
I've seen them around. Not in years though.
I think a soggy potato would hurt more than a penny. I save those for supper.
grabbing em by the pussy is how a real gentleman would have handled that situation.
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The Presidential Treatment? Too soon. I'm still saving that for the right girl. I want it to be special.
this is just what I needed today! LOL
That sure was something, wasn't it! LOL! I was reminded of this time long ago while I sat in almost the place as way back when. Had to share.
Know what's funny? I bet those kids still talk about that moment in time too! Lolol
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It's possible. That was a hard one for me to forget, that's for sure.
Baby Red Potatoes can be boiled whole and mashed with the skin on! Yeah, I know... You are Welcome.
With dill and butter and chopped onion tops MMM MMMM!
Good story. You just need the right potato peeler. Mine is Mom endorsed - seriously, my Mom liked it so much, she bought one too, said it was the best she had ever used.
What about carrot peelers? Do you have a good one of those?
Sure, taunt me when I'm changing your LIFE. Swiss made. lol
Wow! That could peel a Moose!