I have this little book about gratitude from Gregg Krech. A book which I find ground-breaking. Ultimately it refers to a Japanese spiritual/psychological technique: Naikan. And I love it. I have never done a Naikan retreat but used the three questions for wider self-refection.
• What have I received from (person x)
• What have I given to (person x)?
• What troubles and difficulties have I caused to (person x)
Important for this technique is not to ponder the cause why someone helped, but only to count everything which was helpful indifferent if the help was intended or randomly, if the help was given with love or hate etc. For example, I make a list of everything which was given to me
My husband made tea in the morning
He thanked for the fruit salad I made for him
He goes to work to support me
The shop assistant sold me bread
Etc….
All this are things that supported me. I can gather quit a list :-DDD And on the other side the list where oneself was helpful for others is often shockingly short in comparison.
If I am consistent with the practice it helps a lot to get a better mood and to realise how many blessings one has. Right now, I am not very persistent with this practice – shame on me – and thank you for the reminder, I think it would be the perfect moment for me to start it again.
While reading your post, I guessed you are doing something similar (as naikan/gratitude practice) so I hope I didn’t bore you.
Thank you so much for reminding me of this!!!!! I really had forgotten about this technique and with my current situation I think it could help to stabilize my mood.
<3 <3