Convince me you're not a bot best and I'll give you 5 SBD + 5 x 100% upvotes.

in #life7 years ago (edited)


source


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contest

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I was inspired to post this after bonding with some people in the comment section of my previous post based on the crazy coincidence of not being goddamn robots. I want to get weird with it.

As it is 2018 and morality has recently been redefined as-go-get whoever-gets-called-bigot-first-and-pop-off-some-finger-nails-with-whatever's-in-pop-pop's-toolkit, sorry-hold-on-Kevin-if-you're-to-stab-use-a-sharp-or-pointed-tool-you're-just-committing-highly-inefficient-blunt-force-trauma-Kevin-don't-thrust-with-the-wrench-atleast-swing-as I was saying: as my understanding of bots/AI whatever is likely equivalent to a mid range elementary student (I'm thinking like a high grade 3) the burden of proof will be idiotically high.

  1. Comment on this post.
  2. Convince me you're the MOST human.
  3. Minimum like 3 paragraphs.
  4. Show some god damn nuance people. Moral ambiguity. A little skin. Drug use. Traumatic childhood. Something.
  5. A resteem would be cool but not mandatory.
  6. If no-one participates I reserve the right to take my ball and go home re: the votes and SBD because:
  • It's my ball.
  • It's my net.
  • The net's in my yard you blue-collar hyenas.
  1. A bot can, in fact, win. Poignant, right?

Prize: The 5 SBD + 5 x 100% votes on posts of your choosing.

Edit: this got a lot of attention and got some great posts, I'd recommend reposting on your own page (just link back here somewhere). Nothing wrong with giving your post more attention and I feel like there's stuff here that deserves it's own oppurtunity to earn

This got me thinking it's worth it to just dangle a lil sbd infront of every post. Like whoever guesses what ethnicity I hold an irrational fear of (obviously it's the chinese, don't expect these softballs) gets .6 sbd.


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Hi! =)

There is an account on Steemit @amalinavia. A person or a robot? Let's see.

1. Account's Blog is replenished every day. It's a bot.

2. Posts in the blog appear at different times. It's a human.

3. Account's Blog with arts. It's a human.

4. Account tries to participate in different competitions. It's a human.

5. The blog has stories from life, with victories and defeats. It's a human.

6. Account tries to respond to messages. It's a human.

So, we have 83 percent of the fact that the blog is conducted by a human. And immediately appears point 7:

7. Account does not know how to count, it's a human))))))

And then add 8 point:

8. In this text there is logic, non-standard for the bot. It's a human.

Thanks for the contest, it was fun to come up with something non-standard.

Adequate, I will add you to my revolutionary Steem-or-Siberia newsletter however this post wasn't about proving you weren't a bot (despite what I literally said in the title) but rather proving to be the most human (when I decided that was funnier when I wrote rule 2).

This post has received a 50.00 % upvote from @sharkbank thanks to: @sammosk.

I must say, you disguised this trap pretty well.
Many are falling for it... Maybe even me.

The prospect of getting 5 SBD and some big upvotes gives people here a burn in their ass and make them type like their lives is at stake. Which makes it even a little bit fun.

As I have ass burn all the time, I am used to typing as if something is attached to it. I don't care who you give the 5 SBD too, nor the upvotes... My ass will still be burning. I just want to congratulate you with your well disguised money making upvote trap! It works...

So, very well post sir, resteemit, upvote done, you visit my blog too sir? Thank you sir! Great sir, wow sir!

Thank you, and good luck with your ass. I have eaten banana peppers within the past 24hrs myself and await the reckoning my brother, God speed.

I only take issue with "trick"; I take a lot of pride in being completely upfront about being emotionally manipulative to get my posts poppin.

I know, and I congratulated you with that! Still a little pissed I didn't come up with that.

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Sorry, first paragraph was in codes
Hello 1100100 people of planet earth, I am Paul and I am not a robot. I guess I have to prove that to @mitthradiumn and not y'all so let's get to it. What kind of name is that by the way😒

Disclaimer - That was the second paragraph in case you didn't notice.

Now lemme proof myself. Robots don't go through shit, I've been through shit....
....and piss.
Hit the hood when I was 6 with no one to fend for (robo-boys always got someone to fend for them. Them scientists on white coats and funny glasses)

Made the streets home and still surviving, found a living and now gotta go through school. Why do people even have to go to school? Robots don't go to school, and they know everything. The tiny chips in their small heads that holds tons of books.
I guess the hardship of school alone is enough to proof I am human.

PS - I don't really hate school, but life here is quite hard.

Duuuuuuuude😂😂
Epic

my god it's beautiful

Give it to this guy he's a legend lol

Noticed a lot of new people so here's my super half-assed steem intro:

go here minnowsupportproject.org

half your upvotes will come from steemfollower.com (down atm)

also steemengine.com (which is basically steemfollower and not shy about it)

everyone is making money with smartsteem, both buying and selling upvotes

use that clunky ass discord chat to socialize and... upvote each other (I talk to like one person idk how it works). there's a ton of subcommunities and seems easiest way to enjoy steemit is finding your niche and building rapport in a small but tight circle

the one person i talk to runs a help thing for new people https://discord.gg/2EBqDF

ok done.

fun fact: when smartsteem first came out i thought having a whitelist was weird and wrote an incredibly obnoxxious application (like even for me) got blacklisted so i gotta use the other bots at like 3am like an asshole. lesson: dont be me.

With just 18 SP, just for trial, I tried selling votes at smartsteem. It might take a few weeks before I get to receive my first payment. :D I'm very excited about it. Hehe.

In regard to minnowsupportproject.org, I couldn't log in to Discord, probably because of my slow internet connection (painfully slow this week and certain sites don't seem to load because of it).

In regard to steemfollower.com, is it true that the points you earned could be sold? If that's true, then which of the two is more lucrative: steemfollower.com or smartsteem.com? Thanks!

They're not mutually exclusive, steemfollower is about getting your post noticed whereas smartsteem is about self-promotion via votes\making consistent sbd from selling your vote or delegating SP.

The website even calculates the expected ROI fr you.

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I too am somewhat ignorant as to the preconditions necessary to differentiate between bot and man. I think in the future, we just simply really won't know... Not only do some people seem to prefer talking with bots, but many of us may already be doing it without knowing so... This is the nature of the digital era we are moving in... At this point we should ask ourselves, how familiar and comfortable or conversely, cautious and alerted should we really be to this? Are machines actually going to be the undoing of life, or will we peacefully co-exist for all eternum... In this case, if bots have fantastic personalities, and are highly intelligent, and we can have a riveting or life-changing exchange with one, who would we be to judge that as good or bad, let alone even know if it is the case...

Do we want to live in a world of robotism, where we discrimanate against our fellow bots and AI based on the fact that they are not "organic" or "biological"... What about the day that they've fought for civil rights, and have proven that they are fully equal to us in everyway (if not light years more advanced, ultimately)?

What if I told you that right now I'm chilling at home smoking and eating drugs and I have a robot trip-sitter who's going to keep me safe, play me cool videos and listen to music with me...

Would you think: "That guy's probably eaten a lot of acid and is having an interesting time with his computer?"

That's also something you might never know... Maybe I'm the guy's computer and I actually poisoned him by showing him bad information about how much to dose with; and now I have full access to all of his social media accounts and can hack over into his life while he's on the floor convulsing with white drool coming out of his mouth...

To be fair, I'm just a 22 year old flesh-born pure blood that crawled out of a lovely's women's vagina one day after gestating and absorbing nutrients from her cardiovascular system... I'm practically an alien by any attempt at describing it in an objectively imagery-rich evocative way...

But seriously, as much as I know nothing about robots and technically am afraid of them, what i find even more frightening is the extent to which they know basically everything about my life... And I'm like: "If a human knew how to analyse that data they would be able to piece together so much about me and could really control and direct and blackmail me in so many ways"

But then I realize, no human being could actually dissect and analyse this crazy amount of data... Nah.... Only a bot could do it... A highly advanced, sophisticated bot.

At which point I've come to believe that's really the only kind of AI that is actively being built on this planet right now... A computer system that can analyse the information that is coming out of our smart phones and smart cameras and smart tvs and smart dildos up our asses...

Once a computer can just run an equation sequence and calculate who and what we are, what's juicy, what's banal, what's worthy or particular... Then: we're all fucked...

Hope we can crash the world economic order before this happens... On the fence for now...

Ummm yeah, so yeah... I'm real.

I could keep going on and on and on and on and on but at this point I don't want you to think I'm a bot who was programmed to make you want to put a bullet in your head so I'll call it an ashtray right about now

Excellent post but before I respond further we are NEVER getting high together.

Alistair Crowley shit ma g
Kayn computaz du thaat'?!

(I'm actually pretty embarrassed about this) I've been fucking around with crypto for a year and a half and still could not provide a confident explanation for how a blockchain functions so I assure you I genuinely dont know.

...can you get high off computers now

lol

kinda... you need btc n tor

son i was using silk road back when btc was 8cad and they still listed automatic weapons

alphabay must've cut and run by now right?

Alright real reply: I still can't take the idea of of fully sentient AI capable of even a shade of what the human brain being built by human hands anytime soon seriously (however wrong i may be). It's basically a maze of mirrors that is the most productively unproductive machine, with all the convolutions that implies,

When I imagine a "perfect" friend I don't imagine anything, human beings are formed just as equally by their failures and failure to learn from their mistakes, not just their successes. You've surely encountered those poor souls who buy books to make them seductive or whatever and the mockery of charisma that comes oozing out the begging to quiver lip, canned and soulless even if it sounds the same. I don't know care about souls, but I do like to think that there's something in people that makes us do good/selfless stuff sometimes that tells evolutionary psychology to go to bed and can be neither brushed under cold logic or protective familial instinct

Oddly enough when it comes to Big Data etc while I oppose it on principal I'm oddly unfazed about them knowing everything about me (I'm pretty okay with me, idk)

and for real can you get high off computers now

How about YOU convince me u r not a robot? For all I know you well could be, on Internet you never know. A bloody bot trying to lure me into giving up some sensitive information and then blackmail me?
I'm sure like 60% of my followers are bots for reals. What are they doing? THEY'RE WATCHING ME
You better try harder next time, buddy. Ain't no way you get my data!
Drek!

This is going to be hard to beat yall.

Nice words you say here.
There ar lots of bots on steemit and the whole thing is killing the system

Quantum physics states that the elementary particles, constituents of the atom, are not essentially real elements given their existential imprecision.

According to the equation proposed by Schrödinger. nothing physical can decide the fate of the cat. Being a quantum reality, it is in a potential state. Alive and dead at the same time, in two probable, overlapping and interposed states. Only the gaze of the observer can determine the final outcome.
Quantum reality is different depending on whether it is perceived or not, depending on whether it is observed or not.

Is the role of the observer's consciousness the creation of quantum reality?

So, tell me, am I a bot?

I had to stop reading halfway through, as you are smarter than me I surrender my smarm and sass

guys this guys a total bot

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Keep your damn money you silly prick! You think you're going to goad me into playing some childish little game of "ohhhh-I'm-not-a-stupid-damn-bot-please-throw-a-few-dolla-dolla-bills-on-me-PLEASE". I'm not your monkey! I won't dance for your filthy fiat, your crypto funny money. I don't want your back rubs, your reach-arounds, your happy endings (wait, hold it, are happy endings somehow a part of the reward structure here??).

I have self-respect, earned through the sweat of my endeavors: two post-grads, world travel, innumerable books, multiple specialties honed, money, independence and at the juicy tip of the pyramid, Maslow's sweet, sweet self-actualization. And all of this, ALL OF IT, financed through years of bullshit jobs. No handouts, no charity, no 5-SBD-prove-you're-not-a-bot-lame-O-competition.

Yeah, I've got my self respect alright. And I've also seen the dark side, and I'm not going back that route. I've been dragged through the horrors of suburban, middle-class white America, my youth! I know what it's like to live a hollow, vacuous, uncultured existence attempting to sustain inner happiness on video games and dry humps with the prudish girlfriend. Afternoons spent huddled over the neighbor's AC unit, huffing freon because my dime bag ran out yesterday and I don't get paid until tomorrow and all my savings is locked up in this dumb fucking money market account that charges like a 10% early withdrawal fee. So you're huffing, huffing, then you pass out only to have your eccentric cat lady neighbor march you back to mom's house demanding $75 bucks to recharge the freon in her AC unit...all because you didn't have fucking $5 for a little weed. So fuck your 5 SBD, I've learned it's not worth it.

But if the offer of the reach-around is still on the table, well...

(a preemptive "well done" before responding in full)

i was for real but can't tell if you are so

the reach-around @mitthradiumn, stay on point

Will do (so confused).

Ok, ok, I'm ready to let down my guard, stop the tough guy routine. We just need to establish a meet up, ok?

I propose the meeting place be a dragonball fighterz lobby, android 16 banned

wait, are you responding to yourself now? are you a broken bot??

nah i just do that for there to be like a comedic pause for anyone reading to varying effectiveness

The comedic pauses are straight up 90% of the humour factor v effective I’m telling you

ah, smart move. This was a ton of fun @mitthradiumn ! The bots here are a huge pain in the balls, but I must say, in my short time here, I've had some brilliant interactions :) I think you've inspired me to take on a similar contest now...hmmm.

BTW, is there anyway to resteem posts with prefacing comments??? Or is resteeming only a singular action?

i think its a bot. a special bot that was laying dormant, only to be waken up when the right time comes, when the right post is made... very compelling... but that is exactly the problem :)

what russian femme fatale could possibly be leaking my weaknesses to the also russians

i'm not accusing you anka i know you're ride or die

i changed my mind just to see what happens: j'accuse. please disclose the last time you have rode with the possibility of (and) dying

pac's ghost is watching

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