You set a goal.
You defined your outcome.
You created a plan.

...

you failed.

This is something that has happened to all of us.

why is that?

we have all set goals that were out of reach
and often been the recipient of bad luck,

but

for many of us,
self sabotage is the cause of our ultimate downfall.

Let me dive a little deeper.

We all have complex beliefs about our selves. With strong roots from our childhood, we have ideas about who we are, how we should behave and what we are capable of.

This is where things get interesting.

What would happen if you set a weight loss goal, but you hold a self belief that you are fat.

Deep down,
somewhere in your core beliefs,
you have chosen that you are fat

and now

you actually believe that fat is a part of who you are.

What will happen when lose weight?

For most of us the answer is the same.
We will experience an internal tension.
Some part of us will disagree with the results that we have created.
We will resist.

With each pound you lose you increase this tension.
Overtime it will become overwhelming.

And eventually

you will find yourself eating chocolate cake,
watching reruns on your couch.

How can we change?

One option is to work slowly.
With any change, slow and consistent effort is key to sustainable change.

however

you still must endure this time of being in between.

what if there was another way??

What if rather than changing a behavior, we changed the belief?

how would you act if your beliefs were different??

Lets try an experiment

Choose something about yourself that you want to change.
It can be anything, but let's stick to one thing at a time.

now ask yourself

If ________ was different about me, I would act __________.

Write down everything you would do.

Now try

If _________ was different about me, I would feel __________.
Take a moment to embrace these emotions.
Write down each emotion you would feel.

The more effort you exert, the more change you will create.

what's really cool is that as you are imagining yourself in this new state, you are actually telling your brain that you have already made the change!

it can't tell the difference!

Each time you do this exercise, you change your beliefs.

who will you become??