Caught

in #life6 years ago

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What in the name of the wee man is going on here?

The good lady stood at the open door of the lounge with a look of horror and disgust on her face, one hand on her hip and the other holding the little boom. Beside her was the little lady looking confused.

I hadn't heard them come in because the music had been playing quite loudly. She had popped out to meet her friend for a coffee and had taken the kids. She had said she would be gone for a couple of hours.

She had arrived back early.

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Whilst she was gone I had attacked the small number of chores she had demanded in return for my me time.

Once they were done I was free to do as I pleased.

Which I did with gusto. First up was a right good hand workout on the guitar. Once that was done I asked Alexa our Amazon Echo device to start blasting out some loud music.

I had a faff about with Steemit and was just having a bit of chill. All in all, it was a fine afternoon.

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At the point she came in I was walking back from the kitchen with a coffee and couldn't help but swing my hips in a little dance to the music.

I looked up guiltily at her voice.

Oh! Erm, I was just erm... Chilling?

The good lady took a step in to the room, distaste written large on her face.

Alexa! Stop.

She barked.

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The music stopped. She placed a hand on the little lady's head.

Go upstairs little one, now.

The little lady danced away to her room leaving me alone with the good lady.

What the hell is going on, Daddy? I come home to find you blasting out Barry Manilow? The Copa Cabana? The man I married likes Heavy Metal??! Thrash and Gangsta Rap and I come home to this?

I know, I know. I can explain. It's well, you know. I was all alone and erm well. You know?...

And were you... dancing to it? Is this what you do when I leave the house?

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I looked shamefaced and scuffed the floor with my foot.

I don't always do it. It's just, I don't know. I just felt this urge and then one thing led to another and before I knew it I couldn't stop...

The good lady shook her head as if trying to dislodge some bacon.

Barry Manilow? I mean, what's next... Neil Diamond?

She turned on her heel and stomped upstairs to join the little lady.

I waited till she was gone and lifted up my phone, swiping into the Alexa app. I scrolled down the music history, ah there it was Sweet Caroline - Neil Diamond

I hit delete.

Sort:  

LOL pure awesomeness. I will admit as I get older my music preferences change. Hardrock once held my attention like a nice slice of pizza, but now not anymore. Oh and dancing to music while alone is a must! When I do the dishes, I have been know to listen to and dance to the Greatest Showman soundtrack. Now that is great music. haha there may or may not have been some older Disney Movie songs played as well....But hey I am living it up as a Bachelor. haha. Another relatable story, loved it. Neil Diamond is the man by the way! LOL

Neil Diamond is!! I love a bit of Neil. Hehe, I love a bit of everything. People I know often forget though because I like metal and used to be in a metal band and also an indie band and have severel guitars which I blast out metal on. So when they hear something else they do a double take!

Ahh that is really cool that you were in bands! And I can see why they would do a double take to hear you listening to something different. haha. I owned a pink Fender electric guitar back in my teens. Never did much with it. I learned a few things here and there. I also fiddled around with my dads 1956 Gibson Acoustic guitar, beautiful instrument that was, and sounded amazing. Not that I could play it well. Guitar is one of those instruments that if I ever decide to learn something musical, that would be it.

My dream gutar is a Gibson. It is well known in my family but to date I have never owned one. sob It's like fat eis conspiring against me. I am not that good, passable I would say. I do love it though

Well my friend, when are you going to get yourself a Gibson! :)

Maybe the next time crypto pumps ;0)

Ahh yes!! That will be fun! haha :) I need to learn to take profits. lol I still haven't sold any crypto yet, I hold onto it for dear life. lol silly

Lol, I suffer from that to but I have decided next time there is a bull run I am cashing some in!!!

I love all of that. Especially Neil Diamond. I have playlists with him and Cypress Hill mixed in with Stan Rogers.

I'm the only one who likes those playlists.

I would probably like them, I have all sorts mixed together

The correct answer is ... It is a random playlist from Spotify and I wasn’t dancing, I had just stubbed my bloody toe.

Damn, thats good. That would have totally worked! I am humbled by your on the spot thinkery!

👍👍

As I get older, I think of the excuse before I commit the crime.

HAha, rightly so. I should learn from that!

O I just see this in my mind's eye....but don't you go deleting Neil Diamond. Some Sweet Caroline and Money talks and many others have never hurt anybody. Especially not after a few beers or glasses of wine...

After the beers especially!!!!

At least Alexa doesn't judge. She will phone home to store your taste in music in some overlarge database, but she doesn't judge. She will make somebody a fine wife someday.

I am already contemplating taking her to wife myself!

Alexa, make appointment with vicar.

Here's a playlist you might like...

I had a faff? What the hell does it mean? By the way, are you going to the steem fest in Poland?

A faff, a mess about!!

I am going to get and go for a few days. Not the whole thing. I hope so anyway. The good lady is not convinced. Why, are you gonna digital nomad over to it?

Thinking about it. But I have to fly all the way from Cambodia. Maybe I start a crowfunding campain about it.
Social cause: help a poor Italian in Asia to support celebration of steemfest.
Do you know where and when is it? Where do I find the info?

The good lady should be more understanding letting you enjoy yourself after doing all the chores. I believe she also must join in to dance with you. Upvoted!

You are right, she should be joining in the dancing!

you have started down a dark road and the only way is to fight back - hard!

Next time you get some me time, keep an eye out for t good lady's return and make sure you're blasting out a selections from - Eurovision song contest winners.

She'll be only too glad for a bit of Neil Diamond after that ;-)

Oh bahahaaaha! Yes indeed, that would top it all!!!

Hi meesterboom. Should've asked her what's wrong with Sweet Caroline. It's amazing how quickly chores can get done when you have better things to do.

Hehe, she has a pet hate of all of this era of artists. Her dad played them a lot :0)

Been there done that... alone at home listening to kizomba for no reason! I dont even like kizomba! Why would i be playing it! Like my man General Akcbar would say:

Oh god... help @meesterboom! I'm alone at home again and i have an open tab in my browser that says youtube, wherever I end up i think my neighbors won't like it...

An open YouTube never ends well... Never!!! My neighbours always rue the day I get started on YouTube!!

As long as I don't end up at the weird section of youtube where all the illuminati alien cyborg lizard people dwell i'm fine...
Oh look, just learned you need 322 condoms to stop a bullet! So if you need a bullet proof vest for your dick just wear 322 condoms on it!

322 eh, well it just so happens I never leave the house with less that 350... Just in case...

Safety first! I always leave the house with butter in my ass... just in case someone ties me and tries anything... The bad part is that i smell like popcorns all summer... or is that the good part?

Maybe it's better for us to stop here... we might take it to far with the jokes xD

Hahaha, yes indeed perhaps a line should be drawn before it goes beyond the pale!!

Problem is if there is a suicide bomber there will just be one very well protected dick and no body lol.

As long as the dick is ok! What is more important to you? Your body or your salami?

At least they will know it's you or a loved one can identify your dick.

That's some next level CSI Salami right there!

I am like one of those weird lizards and can regenerate from almost nothing so am laughing!!

Ok, i took it one step further... an ak bullet has 1997 j of energy, the nagasaki nuclear blast had 84TJ, since 322 condoms are needed to stop 1997j shot, then to stop a nuclear blast we need 13585133098945 condoms, if doomsday preppers realize this supermarkets will run out of condoms really fast! I can already see bunkers made out of condoms!

What about extra strong ones, would they reduce the number slightky? Or those bobbly ribbed ones, we gotta get smarter!! :0D

I suppose that would be more secure than a condominium.

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