@xeleos your story just broke my heart... But as fellow steemian @ds100 says, keep on because you're doing it right! It might take time, but it'll happen for you soon, you just need to believe it!

You should go through my last posts on life and experiences, maybe they'll help. You are so young, only 19 years old!! The World is yours!!! And you have a special someone who you love and loves you back! The rest will come soon -since you're already going to interviews it can't be long! Don't forget: Love and positive vibes conquer all! Do no despair ! This is the worst mistake you can do :/ Keep on, look up and move to happiness!

Maybe now everything seems black - but it's not. It's really gray and soon enough it'll be white, you'll see!
I'm not going to comment on your parents, because it's not of my business and this whole story is about you not them...
Any potential support from your grandma? Presuming not?

You know that many people have it much worse than you, in all aspects of their lives. I know, it's not helpful -we all have our own problems... but once in a while it's good to look at others, in more difficult situations than us to feel stronger...Imagine someone on a wheelchair... He still smiles, so why don't you? You're so cute and sweet, don't throw away your smiles for anyone, even if that 'someone' is your parents!

I don't know if I helped in any way, but we can also talk in private sometime if you like. Steemians are here and I think you did a good thing posting about that - sometimes you find support from the least expected side... ;)