when the future is uncertain ...

Just now, my close friend died due to cancer. She was on a wheelchair since we were in College. She's just in her 30's. She was in pain for how many years but even to the suffering, she chose to smile always. I salute her for that.

My memories of her just flashed through my mind as I am imagining my own death too in the future. The question is, am I ready to face my own death? I became so afraid. Gone were the days that I showed courage and told my mother , "I want to die early Mama." That was when my religion teacher describe heaven so beautifully with God that I want to go there and be with Him right away. That was when I have no family of my own and no bigger responsibilities to face yet.

As I grow older, that idea changed. That desire vanished and was replaced of that one wish... to give me more time to do things accordingly as God wanted it to happen. It frightened me a lot to imagine my own death. Yes, I am really scared. Do you know why? It is because of the UNKNOWN... the future is UNCERTAIN.

So many questions like: Do we really have eternal life after here? How does it look like? Will I go to what they call heaven? Have I done so much to please the Lord? Will I leave a beautiful mark to my loved ones? and so many more...

It is indeed a matter of faith. When you know that it is uncertain but you continue to hold on to that faith and entrust everything to the Lord. For without Him, everything will really be at lost.

Live life to the fullest!