The Cost of Honesty

Last night, I had the chance to join a discord group talk on helpie server. However, due to my terrible connection, I only caught couple of sentences and phrases. Nonetheless, what intrigued me most was the idea of being honest. Correct me if I am wrong @meno, but there was something I heard about delivering an honest content to our readers and people around us. I think this is important. In the end, I personally far more interested following an honest story than a finely crafted one.

These days in every social media existed, many of contents are superficial. These contents are created to display our perfection. Sometimes, just to fit a society standard we create a false statement and false life. We live in a masquerade. We also feel the need to constantly feed people with the certain lifestyle we picked. I admit I did this as well. I was lying to myself and to people.

Now, I would like to address this very fascinating topic, honesty. To what extend one should be honest? What does it cost to be honest? and Is it okay to be brutally honest?

I would like to start with my own experience.

Shortly after I left the talk, I sent a message to the person who needed to hear my truths. I felt the need to do so, cause if not, I would be creating more dishonesty that will lead me to terrible decisions. To some extent, I personally thought that it was a very cold and unforgiving message. I told that person, “ I wish I never met you”. Perhaps, it was the meanest words I ever said my entire life. However, strangely, I felt I was released from every goddamn straps that was straining. I was very content. I couldn’t honestly describe the joy of telling the truths.

Obviously, mean words and cold truths were flowing right the aftermath. And It was expected. I stayed awake till dawn thinking about the words that was said. I know that it would put a distance on our good relationship we maintain. But I couldn’t run around and bring him into every of my daily conversation anymore. Not only that the lies we created hurt me and him but also the people around us. If there was a reset button and If I were allowed to hit that, I would.

Now, to what extent should we be honest? I would say, In every aspect of our lives when it is necessary. I put an emphasize on “ when it is necessary” because sometimes we have to take an account of the circumstances. Being honest is not only about avoiding making a false statement. But also acting and taking responsibilities of everything we choose in life. Thus,we must think before we act. There’s a saying that honesty hurts. It definitely hurts.However, would you not speak the truth if you’re going to save a life and a trouble?

The implications of lies are like the snowball effect. It gets bigger after one lie,creating a vicious circle that might harm others. Eventually, somebody is going to get hurt. As an example from my personal story, being honest put a distance on our relationship and caused uneasiness. But on the bright side, it liberates me that I no longer have to carry excessive baggage. It is better than to create more lies and involve not only two parties but more people. Honesty is expensive but doable. It might hurt our ego, put us into a little trouble, even losing someone we dearly love. In the end, we’ll eventually find the silver lining. Life always has a way to teach us something.

Now, someone who is brutally honest might not be favorable in a social situation. I often get a trouble just because I say something that I think is the truth. In my opinion, it is because our actions tend to be driven by our emotions causing us impulsively act on it without further thinking and considerations.However, nothing should not stop one from being an honest individual. Matter fact, it is regarded as a virtuous attributes of a person.Finally, if we say, we value honesty, are we ready to accept the truths?

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Any feedback, comment, thoughts, personal experiences are appreciated. Write me on the comment section and I will get back to you as soon as possible.