Still here....

Today felt like a series small wins and nosebleeds. I haven't been very inspired to share lately. I'm still wondering what I'm doing here, I bet you are too. All I can say is I'm up for trying almost anything to cope and move forward these days. Guess maybe that's what I'm doing here.
I've been learning to live again with pain. I know I sound like a wuss. But the majority of the last ten years I had a crutch, if I'm honest I'll still was pretty miserable. I hate when the pain becomes my single focus. Forces it's way to the front of my brain. Sometimes it's kind of a good thing having a touch of ADD. Usually, if I keep moving my mind will jump to any number of things and the pain is in the background. Just when it's more than distracting when it becomes so intense.
I am now learning about mindfulness or meditation. I'm also learning a new language or trying to anyways. Enroled in the local community college. Might even learn how to write, just sayin. I'm just trying to get my mind and body into the best possible shape moving forwards and it does help me to live with the pain again. I still have today and gotta see what I can do with it.
Anyways if you stuck around to read my whatever this is. Thanks