Inner Dialouge -- A conversation.. With myself.

Me: "Hello there Me!"

Me: "Jeez me, I mean.. I knew I was handsome.. but this is ridiculous!"

Me: "Oh you're just saying that!"

Me: "You're absolutely right you hideous, bloated, invertebrate... But really though, Like Boston handsome."

Me: "Is there such a thing??.. Wait, wait.. Like Tom Brady Handsome, or Markie Mark handsome?"

Me: "Both I'd say."

Me: "I like you."

Me: "You're alright kid, you're alright."

Me: "Can I offer you a spongebob popsicle?"

Me: "Is it the one with the bubble gum eyeballs!?"

Me: "Yup."

Me: (flatline)

............................................

Me: "Really should have paid more attention in that CPR class, I just killed the handsomest part of my brain!!!"

Ugly Me: "You idiot, now what are we gonna do when I go on that date in two days!!?.. BE MYSELF?? I can't rely on personality here me.. I have no jokes!"

Me: "Shut up Ugly Me, call up "Big Pimpin' Me," see what he's up to."

................................................

Big Pimpin' Me: "Sup' Fam, whats the dillio?"

Me: "Nothin' much gorgeous just chillin, you?"

Big Pimpin' Me: "Oh me and the lady memories were just loungin on my 4 story yacht, making sweeeet, sweeeet love to the soundtrack of galaxy quest, nothing too crazy."

Me: "Nicccccce."

Big Pimpin' Me: "Aight son, I gotta get to this meeting, but I'll call you back!" (Women Laughter)

Me: "Damn that guy's cool."

Me: "Just get Pushover Me again, he'll do it."

Ugly Me: "We tried that last time, don't you remember what happened??"

Me: "Yes, but he wont have so much seafood this time."

Ugly Me: "This is a bad idea."

Me: "So is YO MOMMA... OHHHHHHHH."

Ugly Me: "I'm you, We have the same mom."

Me: ".. I can't even look at you."

Me: "Rutabega."

Me: "Rutabegas are awesome."

Ugly Me: "Yeah, I'm gonna go ahead and call off that date..."

Me: "Probably a good idea."

I'm not a psycho, I promise haha
Steem on family :)