Why are we so afraid?

I have a friend, well, a couple actually that I've been trying to get moved out of their parents houses in the last year. Now these guys, these aren't the typical run of the mill students that you'd expect to be living at home because it's too expensive out there. These guys have five figure sums (not beginning with 1 either!) in their bank accounts, sitting there, waiting to be used. If they wanted, they could put a deposit down on a house right now.

I can't for the life of me understand that mindset. I wanted out and away before I even had a job. Luckily for me I had a friend of a friend willing to flat share with me when I had secured a job at 19. Times back then were a lot easier. You could buy a house without a degree and a wallet to match. But these friends are happily stagnating in their houses of birth and not doing anything with their life or time.

Exist a little.

Take a risk or two.

Then there was my other friend that hated her job quite badly, to the extent that she doesn't want to go in for work on some days. But the job pays very well, and she can afford the luxuries that she wants, so she's happy with that. But not with the work she's doing.

I called her out on her bullshit the other week. She was trying to tell me to stop telling people to live true to themselves, that some of us 'have to get by' to do what's necessary. After talking to her for a good two hours we found out there were parts she liked about her job, and there were other positions, or avenues she could take to 'be happier' in the work that she does.

Now don't get me wrong, I'm no employment adviser but I could see there was something up with where she was working, she didn't like it at all. But the alternatives didn't seem to appealing. Because to get where she 'actually' wanted to be in life she would have to restart and retrain all over again. And that meant....

Sacrifice.

It meant to her not having her creature comforts, it meant having to scale back on what she can afford and probably stop drinking and smoking altogether. It meant not having gourmet food daily. It meant a lot of things to her. So she was happy to be unhappy.

I guess I can understand that.

You see, there was a time in my life where I was at a crossroads. I had spent three years at college and learned a trade, and I was well known, and headhunted and if I moved in certain areas employment came easy for me. Because there would be someone in the company that I would have worked with before and they could vouch for me. I was a good worker.

But when I fell seriously ill, my mind and body wasn't up to the challenge anymore. Oh, believe me I did try. I spent at least three years trying to claw back what I had learned. But it just wasn't there anymore. And between these jobs I was let go four times. Was it me? I didn't know. But something had to be done.

And I was faced with a crossroads in life. Retrain and have no money, or continue the path I was going and if I'm lucky enough to find another job I could live slightly above poor. So I spent between the years of 2006 and 2009, yes, that's three years scraping to make ends meet whilst I went to University and worked in between. I had to give up the booze and I also had to give up smoking for a cheaper alternative. I rarely went out and had to choose between bathing myself or heating my house up during the winter. The sacrifice was staggering!

Yet, it paid off in the end. I landed an awesome job that paid really well and learned a ton from there too. And I managed that because I wasn't afraid to take the risk.

I feel today we're too focused on the short term rewards and forget to see the bigger picture. Like the job I landed, that took me a whole pay-scale social-class upwards. Long term rewards are far greater than the short term.

And hey, it's called a risk because we have no idea of the outcome. But isn't that the whole fun of it? The journey, the meeting new people, learning new cultures and doing new activities?

I've had some bad shit happen in my life but I look back on it and think,

"Yeah, I'm here today because of that shit"

And I'd like you guys to focus a bit on that. The good and bad shit that you've experienced during your lifetime has moulded you into the person that you are today.

And you are beautiful,

Own that shit.

Take a risk.

Jump two feet in

Ask questions later!

I always jump in the deep end first, it's the best way I learn!

Be awesome friends,

@lifeisawesome