BREAKING BARRIERS

Hey Steemies!

Today I will get more serious and personal than I would be with most of my friends, maybe it's the anonymity that steemit offers compare to other social media platforms, maybe writting on steemit has gotten me more in touch with my inner-self...who knows. I'm a sagittarius and one of our features is deep reflection and finding our higher purpose and the meaning of life. Lately, as I look back into my life, analyzing where I came from to where I stand today, I was hoping maybe I should share with you my realizations in the event some might relate and could inspire some of you to reach for the stars no matter your circumstances. Bear with me as I share some of my personal journey and lessons it will be long and it starts off badly but I promise you it gets positive...don't worry!

Soon after I was born, my father left denying my existence to never return, In my religion ( I'm sure in many religions as well) that makes me a bastard child therefore labeled the garbage of society just for being born and nobody ever let me or my mother forget it possibly leading her to hate me for it ( maybe she hated me for different reasons...who knows, I certainly never will). My mother got married to a different man and had more children and that is when the real nightmare began. I was beaten , mentally abused, neglected and hated by both of them and eventually gave me away when I was around 10 or 11 years old. Bouncing around foster care where I was kept locked in the basement like a wild animal much of the time, group homes (juvenile detention...not for being bad, just had nowhere else to go), sleeping in the streets, homeless shelters and families with a special heart offering me their home for a few days or weeks until I was almost 16 and could negotiate my way into getting a job to attempt providing for myself. In the meantime, I gathered empty bottles on the roadside and garbage and help with whatever house chore somebody would be willing to pay me a few dollars to exchange for a meal or temporary shelter. Being a female, these conditions left me and my body exposed to being taken advantage of by ill intentioned male adults because they knew I had nobody to tell and nobody cared anyway making things worse for me emotionally also labeling me as a trouble-maker and a worthless member of society that litters the streets with my presence and will never amount to anything productive.

As I turned 16 years of age, I got a low paying job in a restaurant kitchen to try to piece my life together but could not attend school because taking care of myself was my top priority and time consuming. The circumstances I lived thru left me full of open wounds and real pissed off at the world and despising everybody for turning a blind eye and leaving me as a child in the nightmare I was in until I became a young adult. I know some of you might think well people in third world countries have it worse bla bla bla. I wasn't born in a third world country, I was born in Canada, the country that prides themselves in having some of the most progressive human rights standards on the planet and that my friends, isn't the typical childhood of Canadians and would be viewed as horrific and unacceptable by most, until it happens to somebody they know, then they turn a blind eye to not stick their nose and get their friends or relatives in trouble.

After working a series of low paying jobs, I was out of school long enough to be able to get funding from the government to subsidize me while I finished and got my diploma. Living in a province with a dying economy due to globalization and my gender as an added barrier , my job prospects were not looking much better than before I got my high-school diploma. I finally woke up and said enough is enough, I am not a victim of my circumstances and I will no longer settle for what society thinks I deserve and took my hatred for the world that was dragging me down and turned it into fuel to make my engine burn and take me to new heights that I never could have imagined and steam-rolled my path into new opportunities.

Almost 11 years ago, I packed up my clothes and my pets, headed for the airport and flew close to 4500 km away from my origins into the unknown without ever looking back with 90$ in my pocket ( here, it gets you food for a week and nothing more) My new home was the economic engine of the country, with the fast expansion and high demand for manpower, being a female wasn't as much of a barrier as it once was. As the construction industry grew, a few females were able to push their way thru, breaking the first barrier for womankind in the industry. Although our presence still not accepted by many of our peers, establishment had softened their stance and made it possible for me to begin a non gender traditional career in the construction of the oil and energy's mega projects. From that point, I started my welding apprenticeship and began working on these projects. At first it was really hard, men were not very accepting of working alongside a woman, constantly being talked down to and groped by many of them ( not the majority but still to many) being told to go back to the kitchen or scrubbing toilets or that I belong barefoot and pregnant in their kitchen, I would be better off as a prostitute or that I was just there to score a rich husband along with many other things really not worth repeating while other men just stood silently agreeing.

picture of me wedged in the corner working away

image by Courtney Privett, called Nevertheless she persisted, image is a depiction of what we continue to push thru to make this world a kinder place for the all the women around the world and by far the best feminism and inspiring image of our time.

During my struggles, I was fortunate enough to be alongside and mentored by the trailblazing women that initially pushed their way in and get insight and the tools to not take the abuse personally and use it as an opportunity to educate men how their behavior is unacceptable and to claim my place among them regardless of their disrespectful opinions or actions. Take my struggles and bust thru glass ceilings for the next generation of women that would come so the movement can continue forward with each of the small victories accomplished by each and every one of us. We still make up a very small and minimal percentage of the construction workforce, still struggle to claim our place and prove we are worthy of being there and as capable as any other man but things have gotten much better and continue to get progress in the right direction as we battle together.

I'm standing in a basket attached to a crane over 200ft up but I would normally have to climb that by ladder several times a day

As you sit here reading this, if you are from a less female friendly country, you may be thinking we have more rights than most other places and that is very true but much of it only sounds nice on the world stage and is not always practiced in reality. Women continue to be domestically abused, 1 in 3 Canadian women will get sexually assaulted at least once in their lifetime, attacked or robbed if out alone too late at night, it isn't as female friendly as they might like you to think. Many still view us as a nobody if we are not associated with a male ( father ,husband...). Many careers pay less than male counterparts and less opportunity for advancements if we even get the job in the first place, many goods and services are more expensive for us than the same product for men, Male figures making uneducated laws on our reproductive rights and so many more injustices that needs to be addressed.

I have since then finished my studies and have decided to take on another apprenticeship in the mechanical aspect of the related field of my career to further my skills and continue to trail-blaze for the future of our gender along with a growing number of strong women. As I look back on my life, I realize I rose from the ashes like a phoenix and tuned my ugly beginnings as strength and courage it was always meant to teach me and without these experiences I would never have accomplished what I have so far and be part of what could be the biggest movement towards women's rights since the right to vote in the developed world. All this was possible because I didn't let anybody tell me I couldn't have this or I couldn't do that and never settled for what society thinks I should be, I marched to the beat of my own drum no matter what and claimed my voice, claimed my place in an unlikely environment.

A MESSAGE TO THE WOMEN AROUND THE WORLD :
If you were fortunate enough like me to be born in a country where we have some rights, don't settle for what others think you deserve, although you may not feel valued or heard ,YOU ARE! Don't be afraid to follow your dreams no matter how unobtainable or odd they may seem. The bigger the risk, the bigger the reward. Let your inner goddess shine thru on the rainy days, take every downfalls as a learning opportunity and a chance to better the world around you for future generations. everything is possible if we all stand together and try hard.

If you are a woman born in a country with limited rights, don't lose hope, change is possible and with the help of your men , break those barriers, your struggles can make it happen in time. Find your voice and don't be afraid to unite and take one small step at a time ( as long as it does not cause bodily harm to you) you may make one step forward and get pushed back two, just take a bigger step next time. Each of the small victories add up and together we are strong. Don't be afraid to dream big and we can all make this world a kinder gentler place to live in.

A MESSAGE TO THE GOOD MEN OF THE WORLD:
Uplift the women in your life, support them and help them dream big and reach their potential. Stand up to injustice rather than remaining silent. Help us in our fight for equal rights around the world. You have the power to help us make this a beautiful place for all. Teach your daughters to shine bright and reach for the stars and that anything is possible no matter what with some dedication. Teach your sons how to properly treat a lady and what is unacceptable behavior.

Many of you may not agree with my story or values but please don't judge too harshly, it's my journey and I am proud of it. We each have our road and our individual lessons that make us who we are. We choose if our circumstances breaks us or makes us. I chose to take my circumstances and pain to fight so somebody else doesn't have to. Perhaps it's what I was destined to do. Take old ideologies and push for upgraded ones. Seriously, if you took the time to read all of it, THANK YOU!!!

Have you discovered your life purpose? a story about what made you who you are? A struggle that turned out positive? feel free to comment and share. I would love to hear it.

Alright, that's enough for tonight!!

cheers xox