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RE: Mind Control: Three warnings from an ex-magician

in #life8 years ago

I have not contacted anyone outside of medical professionals in the states regarding the illness. It's been a journey the last year or so just trying to keep my life and family together with the illness. I don't know exactly what a shaman is but will google it. It would be wonderful to be embraced for the illness in place of being shunned by society. I have limited knowledge of other cultures medical practices because I worked as a health care professional before my illness set in. We were taught to be respectful of others beliefs but to push for the American viewpoint in lifestyle changes for modifiable risk factors and cures for unmodifable risk factors. The thing is schizophrenia doesn't quite fit into that model so it's been blacklisted and kinda a dark subject in the American viewpoint. I was always kind to my patients that suffered from schizophrenia but going through it is way different than what it appears to be on the outside. I do see visions of things that seems surreal, of another universe that runs next to ours but on a different time sequence. Time runs different when I am in psychosis as we term it here in the states. It's like nothing else exists and I have no control over my eyes or body or mind and it just plays these stories that are massively complex but beautiful and terrifying at the same time. I can't be brought back to reality in this state, I do not respond to stimuli not even pain, I don't eat or drink or feel the desire for humanly wants or needs. Just it's so very strange to think you maybe fell asleep then wake up to realize your body as been walking around the house interacting with people and doing things while your mind was somewhere else. I am trained to provide care for medical needs but this... this illness there's no training I could have done to prepare a person or body to be seperates from each other in a way that doesn't emboli the death process. So it seems my soul lies in an in between somewhere between this world and another that no one else sees. I keep hoping to find someone who also sees the other world.

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@pinam27 sounds like you were walking on those planes @kristy1 was referring to , there are many views on spirituality , but what you two describe fits the part, maybe you can find the answers for yourself.

So far all I've got was the "knowing" part and if you don't sustain , ie go back to the normal way of life of drinking and sleeping in a room sitting , you loose those flowers so to speak.

Giving you a follow, thanks for the shared stories to you both and to @skypal for the nice post and my first curation reward D:D (for some reason I wasn't doing a good job by now :D , steemit is a blue bird all right )

Kristy, Thank you for the insight. I have had many schizophrenic patients. And, on every level of education, including a double PhD Math & Physics fella. I know it can strike anyone in a certain age range, and it's for life.
Not sure if this story relates to anything. However, when I was a child up to the age of ten I suffered from constant dejavu. It was ridiculous, I always knew the words like 2 seconds before they were spoken. It was everyday and constant. At the age of ten I was hit by a car, and suffered massive head trauma. Right up until the moment the car hit me I knew what was coming (except for the car part) from a dream I had the night before. As the events unfolded I was in amazement because this time it was from an actual dream, not just from "knowing." Up until the car hit me, I was following along with the dream. A girl from school passes by with her mom, just like the dream, I mimic them and laugh as I pass them. After a few steps I turn around to see if they're chasing me like in the dream. They are chasing me! So I run to cross the street, and a car hits me, and I land on my head.
Months later, I see the girl from the dream at school. She asked me why I ran, I said, "because you and your mom were chasing me," They were running at me screaming Noooo, because I was headed for an oncoming car. I seldom ever get dejavu anymore, it pretty much ended that day in the road.

I have read that in some small tribes, schizophrenia is considered a calling and gift/curse of the ability to see through the vail. When signs present the local shaman takes the person, usually a child, and trains them to become the next generation of healer. I don't remember where I read this though. Possibly a magic book. The modern magician probably originates from shamanistic tradition of using deception ethically, to heal through placebo and herbal medicine, and inspire wonder for the health of the tribe. Maybe you're a shaman.

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