Happyness..

Many years ago I was on my way home from work, drained and stressed from hours of robbing petter to pay Paul. Pay check to pay check was a dream for me at that point. In the weeks leading up I had negotiated the power and water companies to just give me a few more days. You see all kinds of people driving from place to place. Each one is more than a make and model. Each driver navigating has a story. A Mixing of adventures only known by the ones secured inside their minds. Traffic was heavy, it always was at this time of day. I had been following this convertible for a few miles now. A man in his 40's accompanied by his beautiful wife who's hair flicked and flirted with the wind as they traveled. The sun was setting slowly, rays of light redirected by the rings on her fingers. Even at my distance I could see that she was wearing the equivilant of two of my houses on her hands. Displayed as efections of commitment or love for all the world to see.

I don't often look at others with envy, everyone has their own path to take. I did however find my self at this moment viewing their lives for these brief few minuets with a sense of jelliousy. Here is a man I thought, lucky enugh to to have a red Ferrari, beautiful wife and enugh extra money to give her things I knew I would need two lifetimes to aquire. Their hands along with their body language displayed to thoese around them that a conversation had been in full swing. She was just as engaged as he was in this moment. Time passed as the miles drifted on, we both exited at the same deviation. A stoplight was all that separated us from left and right turns. As I approached the conversation I imagined they where having evolved into a reality we both shared. No longer where they perched on Ivry towers. In thoese few seconds the viel was pulled aside and it was clear not all was well in the Ferrari. What was moments ago a story only realized by a few, had disolved into reality. As the cover of the book fell open and pages blown away. It was clear she was not happy. Flirty gestures observed a few miles ago where washed away with negative uglyness. Hands waving in peaceful loving conversation now reviled a truth. They in that moment where not happy. All my daily stresses surely they have long forgotten. Basic life essentials i struggled to obtain had no doubt long fallen from their radar. Money to buy a car that in its self could have purchased my house several times, mixed with diamond that would take me generations to aquire. Ment nothing in this moment. Things I long dreamed of having now suddenly had less meaning. Age old observations and sayings of "money dosent buy happiness" rang truer that ever in this moment. Success and the feeing that that they had some how won the game of life that I had given them just 5 min ago. Was now dirty, raw and real.

We all chase our own demons, follow our own stars. Be them the kind that still hang from the sky, or the ones falling faster than we can run. We will push our selves, beyond points of breaking. Running through grass laid fields in a sprint to find in our minds true happiness. Realizing in the end that happiness isent something that can be tied to a decimal. It can't be owned or purchased. We must remind our selves when the time allows that true happyness isent at the destination. It's in the journey. Stop my friends, stop trying to create your happyness with things found in stores. What your looking for can't be acquired with a PIN number or monthly statement. It exists in the laughter of children, setting of suns and the warmth found in the caress of loved ones. Tears are not just for the sorrows release, they can also be the doorways to the soul. Emotions stronger than words are best expressed in the soft sounds of tears streaming from smiling cheeks. I will never make a million dollars, own anything in the car department with out pieces missing. But what I do have is a wife whom loves me beyond fault. A beautiful woman in body and soul who motivates me to be a better man. Children that know that I would do anything to Keep them safe and hear them laugh. That is where true happyness is.. to search for it in the monitary world will only leave you wanting. Waiting for the next opportunity to apply currency to obtain a wish will only leave you empty. I have in my hand and heart the true meaning of the aforementioned words. So can all of you. Life is too short to focuse on the empty, take a moment to look at what is already around you to realize that this is happyness, this is life. It's all yours. Laugh at everything, seacrch for sweetness, know that no matter what happens you can never loose yourself if you always follow your heart.