#1 - Always Have 100% Energy and Happiness

Now that I am a Stay-At-Home-Mom (SAHM), I no longer need to face the two (2) things I fear the most. They are TIRED and SLEEPY. This is because back then when I was still a Full-Time Working Mom (FTWM), I always go home from work feeling very tired. Of course I was. I need to get up early in the morning, catch the LRT and bus to work, spend 8 hours in the office (including the need to report to fussy bosses) and reach home around 7pm really took its toll on me. The moment I reach home I feel like slumping my body on the bed, but I could not. I had to cook for the family, wash the dishes, get the laundry done, do house work, iron work attire for tomorrow and look at my daughter's homework. And without realizing I have already dozed off without my bed. When the weekends come, I had to juggle between outings and family gatherings with more household chores like vacuuming, sweeping and mopping the floor, cleaning the bathroom, dusting the house, and even more laundry with bed sheets and towels to wash. Life was indeed hectic and stressful. A maid? Well, we were just 'ikan bilis' back then, the normal middle-class people with a pay only enough to cover bills and commitment. Therefore, a maid or a cleaner is not an option.

However, now that I am a SAHM, the word TIRED and SLEEPY are not in my dictionary anymore. This is because with me being at home the whole time, I am able to manage my time, energy and household chores wisely. Like today, for an instance, I woke up at 5am. After preparing my girls for school, I am able to do all the other chores such as prepare breakfast, do the laundry, iron clothes for a week, as well as vacuum and mop the house. And by 10-ish like this I am able to sit in front of the laptop doing the thing I love the most, which is babbling (read: writing) here while my little one is napping. HAHA. Isn't it great? After this when she wakes up I will feed her, play with her, take the laundry in and fold clothes, start cooking dinner, and welcome my daughters and husband back with wide smile. And guess what, by the time they come back, I do not have that tired face and 20% energy left anymore. I still have 100% energy and happiness. Why? Because I am able to manage my time well, I am able to do the things I love to do (babbling here on Steemit!) and all the chores I need to do are done! Isn't it wonderful? So when night comes, I am able to have a good home-cooked dinner with my loved ones, look at their homework, have small chats and read them bedtime stories before going to bed. I do not need to worry about the house work because it is done, I do not need to juggle and I do not need to feel stress. Life is indeed heaven.

#2 - Be With The Husband 24/7

Now that I am not working, I can also accompany my husband when he goes outstation. The best thing is that even he himself feels more comfortable when I tag along, and always make arrangements to accommodate my presence. For an instance, in his most recent outstation trip to Penang, it was a last minute arrangement since he has work in KL as well. So he thought of taking the flight. He asked me to survey flight tickets for myself and my youngest one, and I was like, no need lah, so expensive mah! So then we went together in a car. After his work in KL, we immediately left for Penang the same evening. We reached Penang almost midnight, checked in and the next morning he immediately left for work after breakfast.

It might look troublesome, like yeah it is work but still want to bring wife, apa hal. But it is the comfort he feels that make me always want to be there for him. When I am there, I am able to take care of his clothes, make arrangements for dinner and plan for his day, which makes him feel at ease. Apart from that, I can also accompany him throughout the long drive from KL to Penang that night, which he appreciates. Besides being a SAHM, I am also kind of a Home Manager. I do not only manage the household chores, I also manage my daughters, weekly plans, clothes to wear, places to eat, and I think these small things help to clear a bit of space in his RAM in his head, in which he likes. :)

#3 - Always Be There For The Kids

I can still remember when I was still working, I was a very cranky mother. I got stressed up very easily, and I also get angry very easily, which affected my daughters. This is because my previous job was very stressful. I had to report to a boss who was very demanding, causing me to leave the office feeling very exhausted every single day. Therefore, as soon as I reach home, looking at the untidy house caused by my girls made me very upset. I scolded them almost every single day. I wanted them to understand my tiredness, I wanted them to help me, but they were only 2 and 4 years old at that time, and honestly I was being very unfair. And irrelevant too. But I just cannot help it. I was too burned out that I thought I had already become depressed at one point. It was really a very bad phase of my life which I never want it to happen again. I was a really bad mother.

However, I did not realize any of this (or maybe I did realize, only that I cannot help it) until one day my eldest daughter who was already 5 at that time, came to me one night and told me she was most behind in reading Iqra' (a religious book) in her class. When I heard that, I succumbed into tears. I suddenly felt so useless, so helpless being a mother. I asked myself, what have I done, what did I miss? I have actually missed everything. I do not only miss precious time with my girls, but I also have missed her first day at school, her Report Card day, her Sports Day and Parents-Teacher meetings.

That night, I sat down and asked myself what I really want for my girls. What do I really want from this marriage. Do I still want to work, find money (which is not much even!) and neglect my family, or do I want to start fighting to make things work? It is still not too late. Yes, time has passed, my girls were already 3 and 5 at that time. But do I still want to wait another 5 years before changing things? Must I still look forward to purchasing my own car and house? Will it be too late by then?

The most important thing is, can I really cope? It seems like things are starting to shatter into pieces.

And so this is actually my biggest motivation to become a SAHM. For my girls. To be there for them. To take care, guide and nurture them. To provide love and protection. Yes, this is what I should do since the day they were born, but I have neglected so much. Since I am a SAHM, I spend a lot of time with them now. I help them with their homework. I listen to their stories. I talk to them. And to my amazement, all the effort spent has bloomed into a beautiful flower now. My eldest one got 21As in her exam last year, qualifying her to enter the first class in Standard 2 this year. Alhamdulillah. I am the happiest mother in the whole, wide world! She studies in an integrated school, that is why there are so many subjects. To enter is also not easy for they need to sit for an exam. But I am glad and grateful with Allah's mercy all this while. I have not been a good mother, but His mercy is always with these innocent little girls.

#4 - Flexibility in Time and Income

Apart from having time to spend with my husband and daughters, I can also visit my parents more these days. I used to visit them only like once a month or so previously, but now I am able to visit them anytime I want! This also means more girls-talk with my mother, more attention given to my father who is getting older now, and more time at the home I always miss! I can also meet my siblings whenever they go back to my parents' home and have table-talk with after dinner that is usually extended until supper time. And sometimes even extended to the mamak stall to talk until morning! Hehe. It is fun, really, having to spend time at the parents' home. To meet them, to talk to them, and without realizing as we grow older, there are more and more topics to talk about. Yalah, when we were young we rebel so much, nothing seems to be in common until we cannot talk. Now that I am in my 30s, married with kids then only there are so much to talk about. My mother and I are like the bestest friends forever. I learn so much from her. And sometimes I think I copy her too much too! She is an idol. She is the best example I can ever take. The best wife, the best mother. She always strives for success, doing the best in everything she does. She appreciates everything around her and never take things for granted. She looks things from the positive side and never becomes Makcik Bawang (busybody, judgmental old lady).

And every time I visit my parents, I always make a point to treat them to a meal. It does not need to be lavish, but something we enjoy together. And memorable too! For that, I do a couple of freelance jobs at home such as preparing wedding hantaran (gifts) and help university students with their assignments. I do not have a fixed income every month like I used to, but Alhamdulillah it is more than enough for my own pocket money. This is the money I use as my savings, spend on my parents and sometimes do online shopping HAHA. Who say housewives no money? Housewives nowadays got a lot of money, you know! =P

#5 - Privacy and Comfort

Last but not least, being a SAHM also provides me with unlimited privacy and comfort in my own home. I do not need to go out or meet people that often anymore, thanks to the nature of my current career as a Home Manager. And this gives me utmost happiness. Being an introvert, I do not really feel comfortable being around people most of the time. I appreciate quietness and calmness, family time and peace. And when I do not really go out that much anymore, I feel excited when I get to go out. Go to supermarket also feel happy like can jump up to the moon, you know! HAHA. I feel excited when the weekends come, and I will dress up really nice to go to the malls. It gives me a sense of excitement and happiness.

Being a SAHM definitely makes me a more grateful person. Because I appreciate every single thing that comes to me. I appreciate the quietness in the mornings like this when I can log on to Steemit. I appreciate the hecticness of the afternoon later cooking, cleaning and preparing for my loved ones to come back. I appreciate the time spent with my parents. I appreciate every cent that comes into my pocket for the freelance jobs that I do. I appreciate the short outings to the supermarket to buy groceries. I appreciate the travels with my husband. I appreciate the time I get to go to my daughters' school to see them receive awards. In short, I appreciate everything.

On top of that, I am not anymore the naggy, stressful, angry mother. I am now gentler. I am happier. I am more cheerful. I am more chatty. HAHA. I am happy with myself now, and being a SAHM is the best decision I have ever made. I am willing to forego anything in the world, as long as I get to be with the people I love the most.

P/S: My little one says Hi! :D