Do you know what makes up your Sexual Market Values (SMV)?

Last post I received lots of comments asking for a deep dive in what makes up the SMV as I just touched upon the difference between male and female SMV in terms of when it peaks. We saw that men’s SMV peaks roughly 10-15 years later than women’s who have their prime time in their late teens to mid-twenties. In essence the male SMV comes down two 3 components: 

1. Ascribed: That is your looks, height, intelligence and, nationality and which you cannot really influence as it is given by birth 

2. External: That is money and status within the society. Something you can work for and definitely change unless you live in a caste society (e.g. such as still exists in India)  

3. Acquired Skills: This is where the game is played. Your acquired skills are everything you have accumulated over the course of your life reaching from confidence, charisma, and humor over social intelligence and to what profession you decide to become good at. This is really the bread and butter of where men can influence their SMV in a positive way.  

It shouldn’t come as a surprise, that most of the time the third components is not visible as opposed to the first two but equally important to women as any of the other three. Hence women’s tendency to “get to know a person” first before they decide to encounter any type of relationship is linked to understand what acquired skill the man has e.g. is the confident? Is he aware how human to human interaction works (i.e. social intelligence)? Finding a man with her personal sweet spot of the three traits mentioned above is key for women to follow and execute her mating strategy. Obviously, different women put different importance on each of the three components (similar to men where it is not always about looks and age – especially when considering marriage). Consequently, this leads to different types of game for men who due to social conditioning (depending on society and how they were raised) put their main focus on any of the different components. There are the following: 

1. Good looking guy game (ascribed): Exceptional looks and height. Works out and takes great care of his body. Usually works as a model and women crave his masculine (body based) features. 

2. Provider game (external): Focuses on money and status to provide security for the women  

3. Lover game (ascribed / acquired skills): A mixture of good looking guy game and acquired skills. Charming and humor, this game relies mainly on drawing the women into the men’s reality buy giving her a good time. 

There are also a few others type of game which I will cover in further posts but the two main important ones are: 

1. White knight game: This person has been watching too many romance movies and still believes in the Disney fantasy of princess and knight. Through chivalry he pedestalizes women, usually without any success as he misinterprets male-female polarity and puts himself below women  

2. Nice guy game: Tries to get to know the women first on a friend level and thinks that somehow she will see him as a sexual partner later on. Worst scenario: She cries to the nice guy (who secretly fancies her) over a lover who is not treating her well.    

This above is well summarized in the image below. 

(credit: Tom Torrero, Street Hustle)

The important takeaway from this is that there are 3 different components (ascribed, external and acquired skill) which make up your SMV and how you deliver these through your game (good looking guy, provider or lover game). Let me know if you agree with the above or what are your thoughts. Next post will cover the “acquired skills” in more detail and how to use it them to up your SMV. So stay tuned and subscribe. Until then, happy gaming!   

                                                                                                                                    - Cheeky Fox