Excerpt from "This Side Of Heaven"
I watched her as she spun around, the heavy raindrops cradling her figure like a mother holds her baby, making the rest of the meadow look like a washed out photograph. Her fire and brimstone hair was blackened and dripping wet from the heavy onslaught of rain, but she didn't look upset or lost in the rain, as many girls would have. Instead, she looked as if she belonged to nature, and the rain suited her well.
She looked up at the sky, her hands held out as she laughed. Her joy was louder, and more musical than the raindrops themselves.
I stepped forward, knowing that I probably looked like that one guy in all the romantic movies that always seemed to show up dripping wet, and conveniently wearing black.
She turned to me as I approached, her pink lips turning up to reveal one of her famous brilliant smiles. All of the sudden it was like a light opened up from the heavens and shone down upon her and I couldn't have been more in love with her in that moment. I just wish she knew that her smile, her very presence, is my kryptonite. I just wish sometimes that I could be her Superman. I think to myself as I watch the rain slow down.
She waved, completely oblivious to the weather and my feelings, her evergreen eyes sparkling against her white gown. "Alex hi! I hoped you would come." She said smiling as she stood in front of me expectantly, "Today is amazing isn't it?" She said her face filling with awe as she looked at the now misty meadow which was alight with the fading rays of sunlight.
I moved closer to her and smiled hoping she would reveal her feelings to me so I wouldn't have to tell her mine, "You're right. It's the most beautiful thing in the world." My eyes never left her face as they searched for some sentiment of how she felt about me.
Her face glowed with a new kind of light as she gave me the inevitable ,yet so familiar, hug. I closed my eyes, relishing the moment as I gently put my arms around her small waist, loving the way she fit so perfectly in my arms.
She let go and sat down on the wet grass that grew underneath the giant oak tree we planted as children. "It's hard to believe isn't it?"
I went and sat down beside her, not caring if my blue jeans and leather jacket got wet, I would be next to her so it'd be worth it. "What? Are you still struggling to come to terms with the fact that you yip like a little puppy?"
She laughed the way only she could and I swear the entire world lit up, "No Alex. I meant that it's senior year and it's almost over already."
I looked at her and replied, "Yeah, it seems like just yesterday you pushed me down this hill and insisted that you were a ninja and I was just your sidekick, which, by the way, I still don't agree with. Clearly I would be in charge, because I'm awesomer than you."
She made a face, "Awesomer isn't even a word. Plus back then you were all scrawny and now you're all buff. Every girl at school wants to go out with you. I don't know why you don't have a girlfriend yet."
Because I only want you.
"Well, I guess I'm just waiting for the right one." I lied. "And I wasn't that scrawny, I had a bit of muscle going on."
She gave me that face she always got when she was skeptical about something, "Oh really?"
"Yeah. I was hot back then too."
She laughed and closed her eyes as the wind blew her now dry hair about her face, and breathed deeply. I always loved it when she did this. It was like she was baring her soul for anyone who was willing to look deep enough to see it.
Opening her eyes she whispered, "I'm going to miss this."
I felt my heart jump at the simple hope and sincere sense of loss in her voice. "Yeah, there are so many memories in this place." I replied hoping that she would refute me.
She turned to me and said "No Alex, I'm going to miss this. You and I talking.. and being able to count on you to always know just what to say to make me smile." She was quiet for a moment before she continued, "To think that this is all going to be a simple memory that couldn't be everlasting in the moment, is just...Impossible."
I could hear the sorrow in her voice and instantly I wanted to do something... anything to comfort her and make her laugh.
"Christina. Look on the bright side, we have a whole month before we graduate and then the summer after that."
She leaned on my shoulder like she used to do when we were kids. When we had an eternity to run and be idiots without a care in the world. Now, it seems that all we have left are a few precious seconds to spend pretending we have more.
"Alex?" I smiled at the way her voice just seemed to make all my problems disappear.
"Mmm hmm?" I felt her hair tickle my neck as the cool wind blew it lazily across her shoulders.
"Do you think I'm weird?"
I laughed at the bluntness of her question "Yes Christie you are the weirdest person I know but I wouldn't change it for the world. It's what makes you perfect." She lifted her head up and I gazed into those never-ending green eyes watching intently as she smiled. It was like seeing the sun after decades of knowing nothing but darkness. In that moment there were so many things I wanted to do and say to her but I couldn't seem to work up the courage. So I stayed quiet even though I knew that I would always regret not saying what needed to be said.
Before I knew it, that moment was over, and she rose in one graceful turn of those long tan legs and reached down to hug me tightly, her short arms barely reaching around my hulking form and said sweetly, "Thanks Alex. I will never forget you."
I smiled as she listened once more to the wind, but his time I heard it whisper "Christina! It's time to come in!"
She looked at me apologetically and said "I'll see you tomorrow Alex!" I watched her run barefoot across the dead leaves that covered the lush green grass on the hillside, her hair following after her like a wave of fire over a mountain side. I stayed there and closed my eyes, feeling the weight of all my emotion crashing in on me. All of those years of waking up and telling myself that this was the day I would tell her and then never going through with it. It was truly heartbreaking because this was my last chance to tell her before everything changed. All of my borrowed time with her is running out and the realization of never seeing that smile or hear her laugh or feel her arms tighten around me, was almost too much to bear. I felt hot tears run down my cheeks, as it set in.
Suddenly I heard a scream rip through the night like broken glass. "Alex!"
I would recognized that scream anywhere.
It sounded like a wounded puppy...
Written by me
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