Sometimes anxiety serves to give a better sense of caution.....

I know I have had the best of opportunities but it was not easy to crack through all of them. There's a lot of randomness in the air now and I won't have very much control over anything. I would not let this lull me into becoming thoughtless or not caring about what I am doing. Sometime being a mute spectator and being an observer also paves the way for a solution. I would do what I can and save some energy for rest of my life when things might be smoother.

I might be set up to be the smart one and solve a problem or two for someone else. While it might be my idea of fun to perform and be clever, I will try to keep things simple, especially if this is a work-related issue. It will cost me little or no effort and win me a lot of admiration, and maybe some monetary reward later.

I do understand that some days are perfect for making big ideas and plans. Other days are better suited for taking care of the smaller details. So during my off-time, I would take advantage of the time to get my unfinished jobs done and make my desk organized. I would go through my emails and either archive or delete anything that doesn't have immediate relevance or even engage myself in some homesteading jobs. Then, when the day for big things comes along, I won't be bogged down by the boring details.

So I will try to relax, take a deep breath, and don't let any feelings of anxiety derail my plans. A certain level of nervousness may be in the air but it doesn't have to be contagious and I don't have to catch it. If a touch of anxiety serves to give me a greater sense of caution, that can be a good thing.

I have walked through this life little longer, and it probably has been, with the heavens in the erratic, spontaneous and impulsive mood they're in, my usual bedtime won't feel like bedtime. Rather than lying there, trying to think of some way to make myself tired before dawn arrives and the birds start singing (which will sound much more like screaming, at that point), will it be about giving in and planning something that will tire me out? Oh, I am getting intense with my thoughts....

I don't want to spend my whole life trying to swim upstream and upstream only . Because without downstream, upstream has got no worth and vice versa. I would work on my self-control and wont let anyone or anything lure me into overreacting or flying out of control. I would be practical and won't get in my own way. I can have my silly fun later, and fantasize my revenge, at home in private with those who love me no matter what I do or say.

And it continues.....

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