A Taste of Freedom.. Shutdown!

Today I received news that the exit I wanted to take from work is shut down. I have mixed emotions about this situation, but I can say I seen this coming.

I work for a big box retail store here in the great old country of the U.S.A. I have been doing so for the last 13 years. During my time there I moved up, and also go to a few different salary positions and went through a lot of changes with the with the company. I've delt with crazy situations, crazy customers, have my life threatened, worked crazy schedules and many other things I can't recall at the moment lol. I've done a lot. Yeah it's a glorious place to call your job. 🙄

A few weeks ago I got news that they are doing away with the overnight positions, and we are losing 2 salary positions. That's when the magical word severence was being passed around. Usually you would fear on what was going to happen and if you will still have a position. I was actually excited for the first time in a long while. I would get a chunk of my salary and for the first time in 13 years the holiday season off! ( Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years). I planned on vacations, steemfest, and spending more time with family with this potential free time I would get. I was happy with the fact that I could do all this. I was hoping that this was the sign to exit the place I've been wanting to leave for a long time now. So I went ahead and told my store manager that I would volunteer and take the severance.

Over the last few weeks it was a roller coaster ride of emotions. I talked to my old boss about it, he kind of told me the realistic answer about not getting the severence. Add to the fact ( not to toot my own horn ) but I am one of the effective managers in my store. So then I kind of gave my hopes up for it after assessing the situations, but I kept getting mixed messages about the severence package. This morning I officially got the news that I would not be able to get it due to some bull shit excuse they made up about salary positions. So here I am sucked back into the machine. I cant help but to think that these moves are not to make the stores better, but it's to satisfy the share holders to cut down on costs and stuff their pockets with more $$$.

The bright side of all this is that, this bump on the road showed me that I was really unhappy in my situation and that it's on me to make the changes possible in life. I will slave away what I hope to be my last holiday season, and start my new journey in the new year.

While looking for job/career opportunities 2 weeks ago, I ran into an awesome quote on an old forum post that gave me inspiration.

"One of the things I learned very late in life was never be good at anything you do not like doing; so you might be a good programmer and hate math, but I do not see the point of doing it in that case. have spent 10 years undoing being good at things hate doing; but people eventually do stop asking you to do them"

This reminded me life is limited here on earth, I need to ensure I enjoy this journey we call life. We need to do things that make us happy. Yes I know a job is a job, but I cant help but to feel that society really messed up and the work//life balance is really tipped against our favor.

So I sit here at 31 years old, ready to move on and make the changes I need in life to be happier. It may not be the way I wanted to do it, but it's still a move I will need to make and need to do.

/venting over :p

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