Price of words

Hey.

I have now written a greeting. This is a tribute to the tradition of greeting at the beginning of a conversation. Although I did not want to do this. I wanted to do without these courtesies. Then I will allow myself to do so. I would consider that we are close enough for such communication.

Today was an interesting day and the first thing I wanted to say was that I stayed at work. At least until tomorrow. Although I wrote that I was tired and that I was leaving. I am anxious about what I say, and especially about what I write. And now this incident to stay live in the blockchain. A prince of what I said and did not do. I'm not perfect, and maybe I did something wrong or got excited. I reproach myself for it.

OK. What happened ...

In the morning I felt good, in principle. I would call it the state of primitive dance. And I realized that people like parasites can jump on you and climb into your head. And then this connection with the primitive dance is lost. You seem to be inside a person or he is inside you. But the fact is that something that enrages you ceases to enrage you, humility comes. And from this, and good and scary. It seems to me that many people since childhood live under this dome, or this I am. And the point is not whether it is good or bad, but in the knowledge of who you are and what is happening.

So this morning, I very clearly realized this process of attack, he was so powerfully knocked down that sometimes I do not even understand when and how this happens. First you are not pleased, then you start laughing. It's like a drug for the beast.

At lunch I told the boss that I no longer wanted and could not, and that I was leaving. So he began to tell me that try again until Thursday as agreed (and we agreed). I listened to him and realized that I did not feel my resistance, which was still in the morning. And everything he says so nicely pours into my head.

And I really felt better, I tried on calls with customers and additional forces appeared. And the deal turned out and I'm not as tired as last day. But I am as if fascinated by it. These processes are of a doubtful nature for me. I will be more attentive to this all.

....To be continued...