Ask and You Shall Receive
I have a difficult time asking for things. My Grandpa passed when I was young, and my Grandma immediately fell into a dark depression. Here we were, just us two, stuck in America where my Grandma didn't know the language, I'm 8 years old dealing with the funeral arrangements, the bills, the business (we had a 180 acre Arabian and Quarter Horse ranch that catered to Hollywood celebrities) my own schooling, and what little I could do for my Grandmas mental health spiral.
I took care of everything and everyone from a very young age through my late teens. I know this is why I have a hard time asking for help- due to the circumstances of my childhood there was no one to ask so I was conditioned to do it all myself.
There are many reasons why you have reservations against asking. You may have been denied or disappointed so much that you are conditioned that asking will usually result in letdown. Or you may have been raised with very little and knew not to ask because it would be an impossibility.
But that was then and this is now. You are a different person with a different set of individuals surrounding you.
People want to help. It's in our nature. You know that warm, fuzzy feeling you get when you help someone? We all get that and want to keep helping. Your close ones want to help. But no one knows how- we are not mind readers. You must ask. And the more you ask, the more you will realize that the human species is a community, and we all do things for each other. We all want to help.
Don't deny others of the warm fuzzies! Ask a loved one for something today!
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Do not allow past disappointment to stall your future happiness.
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Side note. I've just recently learned to ask for help; But it's from years of being told no. Now the people that said no are under investigation.
It may take time, but good things come to good people...
Be still my conditioned responses... I hear the whispered murmurs sweetly caressing the treetops... I am therefore humbled, and bow my head with a sly grin to thee..
you're right, it is terribly hard to ask for help. But everyone needs help at some point or the other. It's a matter of getting up the courage to say so that stops people in their tracks.
This is the same whether the need is financial, material, or emotional. You don't get the help you need unless you let people know you need it!
True story.
Even if it's something as mundane as helping you with heavy groceries up a couple flights of stairs.
Great to see you Mike :)
Real life suggestion. I am also little bit uncomfortable to ask something. I am agree with you, People like to help though not everyone.
You're right- there are selfish people. And there are also those who help with an agenda. But, in general, people are good. People, in general, enjoy helping others :)
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I also had that problem. Asking for help felt like admitting weakness and putting myself in a vulnerable position. I have gotten better now but there's still a ways to go
Yes! One thing that helped me is to change my perspective- instead of me being weak by asking, my asking is giving them a chance to do good and feel good. Seriously, a simple change in context does wonders for tricking your mind!
Hmm never considered that before. Ill try it out, thanks.
It's all about misdirection ;)
Lol!
Oh my, do I have trouble asking for help sometimes. Thanks for this reminder.
You are welcome :)
Remember, you can't do everything yourself. And people want to help!