Introduction and my background struggles as a Korean Adoptee

in #introduction6 years ago

What’s up Steemit? I got my final approval to join the Steem community a few days ago and was not quite sure how I should introduce myself to everyone. After checking out some articles and trusting my gut.

I figured my backstory could be helpful to someone else and I might as well share it. I am now in my mid 30s and was adopted as an infant from South Korea. I was adopted by two of the most caring and giving people in the world. I went to a local HS and played soccer. However, I am not sure my parents truly took into account what bringing an Asian child into a predominately white community.

I endured many days of taunts and racist remarks during my school days. This created a level of anger and distrust of people that at times I still carry with me to this day. I just wanted to fit in. I could not walk anywhere without sticking out. Whether it was because I was shorter than all but one classmate (who later had a crazy growth spurt and left me in the dust) or that I did not look like anyone else in the room.

I felt so out of place.

I do not think this was done to me on purpose or with any malice, but these are daily struggles I had. I did not have anyone I could truly talk to about these issues. My brother was also adopted from Korea but was four years younger than me and when I was going through these issues a 10/11 year old was not equipped to help out with.

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While playing soccer and other sports I had kids call me names such as chink or pull the corner of their eyes to the side to represent how they felt I looked. I had my fair share of fights or altercations as I did not understand how ignorant people can be and how words/actions can truly hurt. It truly is not that easy to turn the other cheek.

I will say that in the end all of these events helped build me into a stronger person but it did not come easily. I had bouts of depression and suicidal thoughts, but nothing ever came of them that negatively impacted my life.
So, if you are dealing with bullying, ridicule or anything that brings on depression like feelings know that there are brighter days ahead. Take advantage of each day being a new day to get better. If that means going for walk, finding a new hobby, utilizing the friends you already have or talking to a professional if need be. Don’t be afraid to ask for help as it is not you a bad thing.

As I look back now on those tough days, weeks and months I am glad I was able to get through it. I do not know exactly what got me through it but I did. A few months ago, I lost a close childhood friend to suicide and it shocked us all. We all have difficulties in our lives and encounter times where we wonder how did I get here? This is not where I wanted to end up. I am reminded of a song from my childhood by Semisonic which stated that, “every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.”

You will inevitably hit that fork in the road and do not be afraid to choose the path less chosen. Do not see every stone or hurdle in your path as a negative or true roadblock to your happiness. Nothing worthwhile ever came without a cost.
My challenges in my youth in a lot of cases have become my pride and inspiration in my adulthood. We all must weather through the storm we call our lives and trust that GOD has a plan for us.

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I will end with this, as an educator I hope to instill this type of perseverance and grit to my students. I know I will not be able to get through to all of them, but I must start somewhere. I am working on expanding the influence I have through a new blog and podcast that are in the beginning stages of being implemented. Be on the look out for those as I will discuss education issues, teacher issues and student concerns to begin a conversation on how we can truly get better. The elephant in the room will become the focal point which I strongly believe will lead to finding positive and productive solutions to our problems. Nothing worthwhile comes easily.

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