@karenb54 replying to an earlier reply as the option to respond to your latest reply is absent, something about comment depth I believe.
If you would like some help with your situation and developing your self esteem I would be very happy to offer you some of the resources I have created for SurgingLife. I usually just leave it up to the universe and whoever comes to them comes to them, though in your case I would actually like to offer them to you free of charge. How does that sound to you? If you find them good for you and really are happy with what they do for you then you can always rate and review them which would be lovely. :)