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I used to be similar in regards to being around people, and I still have issues sometimes.. I think I may have a mild form of something, I'd prefer to not get it diagnosed personally cause I'm sure there's something or other that they can label me with. Heh. Though hey.. I bet you could get better at it if it's something you really want and work at it. I'm a strong believer in people getting better at many things if they try. Not everything, sometimes we limited.. But, I think oftentimes we can do more than we think we can. :)

Yeah, I mean I can, the problem is not being able, the problem is the fallout.

I worked in sales for 6 years, I know how to talk to people, be civil, polite and all that stuff. But when I get home I lay down on the floor for hours and cry until all the pain as gone away.

Why do I have pain and need to cry? Because I had to ride the subway and someone got in my personal space. Because I had to talk with a bitchy cashier. Because I tried my best today, and my best drains all my energy.

Having autism is not like being depressed or missing a leg, it's like playing football, but with an invisible ball (which all other players can see). :)

Sorry for the delayed response. I get a lil overwhelmed sometimes with all the social media and keeping up with all the messages, but I am a bit OCD when it comes to trying to respond to every meaningful conversation as far as it'll go until it naturally fades.

In response to your message.. I'm not totally sure I understand what you mean.. I have some ideas.. But could you clarify with some different words perhaps?

The impression I get is.. Perhaps you're like taking in tons of information and you're trying to keep it all inside you until you get home where you can just let it out in the privacy of your own area? I'm lucky I live out in the wilderness and don't go into society too often, so I don't have to deal with that as much.. but I think I have a bit of social anxiety as well..

When I was young my parents took me out of school I was so uncomfortable there, it like made me ill.
So like.. To me this seems like a kind of natural response. It's not a sign of health to be well adjusted to a sick society.

However.. It does seem like it's a decent issue for you, have you been thinking about ways you might be able to improve the aspects that are making your life more difficult? I imagine you must have thought about it a lot? Would be kinda hard not to I would think..

If you ever want someone to talk to about it, I'll listen.

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