Go ahead, be virtuous and don't click on a post that has "sex" in the title
I won't tell you much about myself, for 2 reasons:
1) I don't think my age, my hometown, or my job are of any real interest to anyone.
2) I live in the Deep South, and I don't want to get fired.
So for now, I'm going as Kay, and I'll stick to the basics. I'm a woman in her late 20s, happily married, and in an open relationship with my husband. And while yes, all the extra sex is great -- and it is (for the most part)! -- confronting the day-to-day realities of living non-monogamously can be a challenge. Sometimes I don't even realize I'm breaking a societal norm until it's lying in pieces on the floor; other times, I'm shocked by how infrequently people in "regular" relationships reflect on the rules and boundaries of their arrangement... and then I remember that I, too, never thought about such things until about a year or two ago.
The intention of this account is not to brag in detail about all my steamy, non-secret rendezvous. It's for serious thinkers who want to think seriously... about sex. Below are some topics I'm considering:
- catching "the feels" (HINT: It's only a big deal if you make it one.)
- the pitfalls of default monogamy (not monogamy in general)
- talking about what you need/want
- unexpected results of hetero open relationships (AKA Guess who gets laid more?)
- sexual orientation vs. sexual practices, esp. when it comes to workplace protections
- deciding how much and who to disclose to (if anyone)
Of course, I'm always up for suggestions! Please leave some in the comments section below.
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Welcome to the community Kay, I love your ideas for posts, definitely following you since I'm in the "catch the feels" mood lately! Looking forward to your content.
I can relate -- I've definitely been-there, done-that, got the t-shirt. Not promising any epiphanies, since everyone is different, but I have thought a lot about that topic and hope to share some insight from personal experience. Stay tuned.
welcome friend, hope all your dreams come true here. Very interesting niche you have there. Im sure it will pick up and do well on here.
Thanks for the encouragement. I dream of interesting discussions more than fame, so I think they will come true!
Hey this is really interesting! I have definitely thought in depth about the pitfalls of default monogamy and I wonder if your ideas are the same as mine. I haven't been able to talk to ANYONE about them except for my kind-of boyfriend. I am in an in-between position right now. Just a simple question here for you to see: is it because people tend to settle down immediately and stop improving? Thanks for taking the time to write!
Well, I hope to do something more detailed in the near future, but here's my thoughts on it, off the cuff. My opinion on default monogamy isn't a criticism of the results (being with just one person), it's a criticism of the process (not making a conscious decision to be with just one person). Anytime people make a major personal decision -- and how you choose to lead your life with your significant other(s) definitely qualifies! -- they should decide not because of societal norms but because of who they are, whom they are with, and what they hope to make of their life.
Now, do I think that personal stagnation results directly from default monogamy? No. But I guarantee you that those who choose monogamy -- or any other relationship style -- are better communicators and more in tune with the needs of their partner(s).
Hope that helps. Sometimes I ramble...
We're going to get along juuuust fine, you and I. I have been looking for like-minded individuals that can have open and honest discussion about sometimes either morally or socially obscure topics involving the "S" word. Nice to meet you.
Following for honesty, and moxy.
Thank you! I hope you enjoy/benefit from my blog. Please feel free to leave topic suggestions at the bottom of any post; my ultimate goal is to engage in very fruitful discussions with people.