Hello I'm @conciousthinker & This Is My Introduction Post

This is my #introduceyourself post although it's my 2nd post (3rd if you count DTube) as to get started I entered a competition which helped me learn my own way, which, if you make it to the end, you should understand why I have to learn in unconventional ways.

I initially came here to escape the YouTube ‘echo chamber’ with hopes of detailing my experience of a lifetime in what I thought was the truth movement. I expect it will be a recurring and underlying theme of posts to come but...

I am not a truther!

I survived the severe control that all things conspiracy or truth have on the mind. I hope to offer a different perspective where the difference between truth and belief is clear and I will never ask you to trust me unless I am talking about my personal experience which is presented only as testimony relating to how I reached my conclusions. In short I won't be claiming to have insider information about the government or colonies on Mars, only information about the time I believed such things from others.

I never had a desire to be on ‘social media’ or blogging, but on Steemit I see opportunities to experiment with creativity, the one constant I’ve kept throughout my unstable, ever changing ‘background’.

Initially my background was meant to be left out with anonymity being the goal. Despite still having reservations about sharing this, I feel without knowing my history and details, the psychology behind the decisions that lead me down the rabbit hole and the difficulty in returning, would be lost in what will essentially be autobiographical posts.

To this day it's difficult for me to describe so I thought I would let this ‘diary entry’ I wrote a few years back do the talking…

I write this at a time when at last, I feel mentally able. My life is now in its thirty first year. I sometimes think I'm thirty two years old as my brain cannot work out what day or month it is so people's (and even my own) age, birthdays and other details people expect you to remember aren't something that sticks in my memory.

It wasn't always like this, though I can't recall the last time my brain was running at a level most would consider 'normal’. That's why I decided to write this now.

I write from a viewpoint of the person I am today. The person I am today isn't the same person who I will be writing about. The person I was I guess you could say was born after a brain injury aged eighteen. I felt I woke a different person. A person I had to get to know and learn to live with.

The injury sent my life in directions I could never conceive of. I further became different people as the effects of the brain damage rewired me and my attempts to comprehend this created people looking back on, I don't recognise anymore.

While writing this the fluctuating mindset over the past few weeks caused by simply a common cold, has made it even more clear to me how drastically my character, personality, emotions… These words I am cycling through, trying to describe how the brain injury changed me are close but not able to fully convey the complexities of the changes my mind has been subjected to.

This difficulty to explain, how I felt and why I felt I was falling apart, is partly to blame for the years without help and doctors making the situation worse.

How do you explain to a doctor that you woke up, as I generally remember saying, “a different person”?

So that is my past. I am always recovering, not from the physical injury but the deeper subconscious effects that I had to dive deep into and face the pieces of the past that create the person I am today. I called the account @consciousthinker as I used to call myself a critical thinker despite being trapped in the truth movement. Today I work every single second to understand what most take for granted… Their own identity or ego.