I hope that you get approved.

Insane how reliant they still are on paper for verification. I understand that they don't want identity fraud, but they're protections and much beyond those of regular commercial online institutions. Most will be perfectly happy with a photo of a Driver's License. In the very least, they could come up with some way to do this without opening a new bank account. Perhaps going into your local government and getting a signature there? To your point, at least crypto is easy to get.