A moment of silence please - the last @msgivings article got a total of 112 flags. She/he has moved 9000 SBD to Bittrex - I think we've seen the last of him/her.

How is @bacchist going to get through the day? Who is @reneenouveau going to hunt down now? And what is @berniesanders going to upvote next?

To answer those questions: I've hired an award winning author of 10+ books, 100+ films and adverts and 50+ advertising awards to give us his take on @msgivings.

@BSGivings

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Original words in italic. All pictures taken from the original article

Number of flags: 3
Money earned: $614.30
Total words in original article: ≈ 500
Favourite response/comment to original article:
@kyriacos Your dating/romantic advice is along the lines of "Tips in keeping the water wet"
Favourite response of someone who missed the point that @msgivings was a bot:
@kainmarx It's always nice to hear a woman's opinion of what makes a man more or less attractive

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Six Attributes Women Find Appealing in Men

Personal differences usually come to play in determining what characteristics or attributes we find appealing in the opposite sex but there are a few non-compromising ones. These are attributes every girl wants in a man:

Critic’s note

I just love this guy’s categorical approach to a subject. No findings. No research. Just opinions stated as fact. Well, that lends credibility to the argument. Yes he acknowledges that opinions vary, and then he throws the notion of flexibility over the cliff by saying that the next six points are inarguable. So, for the sake of argument…

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Height: Most women want their men to be tall, someone they can literally look up to. Like my friend Nina would say, “If he ain’t tall, there ain’t no point to it.” Giving it a deeper look, I realized that most fantasy romance books almost always made out the Prince Charming to be a man who “towered over his lady” and she had to “stand on the tip of her toes to kiss him.” What more can I say? Tall is sexy guys!

Critic’s note

If this guy used any broader a brush he’d be a housepainter! Anyway, I’ll be sure to inform Al Pacino, Tom Cruise and Jack Nicholson that they have no sex appeal.

Well, I guess that’s it for anyone under 6 feet tall. If you are one of the 80 million US males in the 5’ 8” to 5’11” range, be sure to get counselling. And if you’re under 5’6”, may I recommend seppuku?

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Funny men are the new kind of attractive: One of the surest ways to know if a lady is attracted to you is by checking how she reacts to your jokes. If she laughs easily and freely, there’s a good chance she really likes you. Like my girlfriend will keep telling me, “he never makes other girls laugh this much!” I guess you know what she means.

Critic’s note

Agreed, humor is highly underrated in terms of personal appeal. Making people laugh is also congenital (like being tall). However, having a sense of joie de vivre is an entirely different matter. Love life and laugh a lot. But, be careful there as well. As Goethe said: “Nothing defines a man’s character more clearly than what he laughs at.” It’s all about taste…and a light touch.

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Generosity: Every lady likes to be spoiled no matter the independent air she puts up most of the time. So a man who is able to give freely to his lady will soon have her eating out of his hands. Just so you know, when your girlfriend convenes with her friend, they are discussing whose boyfriend buys the most gifts for who. Trust me on that.

Critic’s note

Where do I begin? First of all lose the graphic that looks like someone dropped a bunch of “Red Hots” around the most tasteless Valentine box in recorded history. Second, the entire philosophical approach is saying, “My bitch is for sale. So I can buy her loyalty.” Hmmm…maybe you might want to consider finding a woman with some depth? And finally, generosity is only one aspect of something called thoughtfulness. I think that’s where the author was headed with this, before he stubbed his toe on The Material Girl.

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Full of surprises: Do you know what makes people boring and relationships to end most of the time? When they become too predictable! Thus a spontaneous man would always be attractive to most women. Today he plans a sudden trip to Hawaii. A few weeks later, he wants to go rock climbing. When he returns from the office, he’s bearing a bouquet of flowers. Some mornings, he leaves a poem under her pillow. And so on and so forth. You catch my drift right?

Critics note

First of all the illustration looks like a 1940's ad for Life Savers. (So are we selling mints?) Yes, Tony Robbins and other motivational gurus warn us about The Iron Law of Familiarity and how to avoid it. How you introduce novelty into a relationship is up to you. Anyone and everyone can do it in the beginning. But after year two or three—that is the challenge. But apparently the author doesn’t believe in long term committed relationships anyway. So what the hell.

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Intelligence: The world is advancing and the nerds have become the new cool. And as a result of this, most ladies want the brainy guy; the guy who knows something about almost anything. People who are attracted to intelligent people are called sapiosexuals and they are most likely to be intelligent themselves. Intelligence rocks big time! My girlfriend tells me that whenever I am going on about some deep subject, maybe on science, politics or business, she usually just want to hold my face and ravish those sexy lips of mine!

Critics note

Well, smart is sexy if you use it wisely. In truth, intellectual prowess is like pepper. Sprinkle it on to season the conversation and establish your wit. Beat women over the head with your high IQ and encyclopaedic knowledge, and you will end up being the loneliest genius at the cocktail party. Remember, you’re dealing with a population consisting of 22% Millennials, 30% of whom don’t even know who the first US President was.

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Personal hygiene: This is so important it is non-negotiable. Clean and well dressed guys are hot as hell! Ask any lady around. Personal hygiene tells a lot about a guy than most people realize. When you take good care of yourself it shows that you respect yourself and have a healthy dose of self esteem.

Critics note

And for my next observation, I would like to declare that, “The Earth is round!!” Unless a woman is a “grunge freak” or has absurdly low self-esteem, of course she wants a man who takes care of himself, takes pride in his appearance, and bathes. Of course, given the social explosion of soup-catcher beards half the men in America look unshaven and in need of a bath. (Go Figure.)

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When a man has these six attributes, the ladies are going to be trailing after him like insects to a ripened fruit. Don’t say I didn’t tell you!

Critics note

As long as we’re being somewhat superficial, you forgot the two most important elements in male sex appeal: Money and Power. A Former Secretary of State, when asked by Mao Tse Tung about why a fat man like him had so many women, replied: “Power is the great aphrodisiac.” Enough said.

And for the most underrated appeal not only to women, but also to other human beings (and all the birds of the sky and beasts of the field) - look to kindness

Critics Final Note

This article shows constant examples of @msgivings “Lolita Problem…” He shows an entire bevvy of underage nymphets in his articles. Is he in reality Humbert Humbert?