Unknown to Known - The Underdog Kid

Hello Fellow Steemians !

I am Bethany and you can call me Beth

Growing up I was always this bubbly kid running around with her cousins trying to catch up with the fast phased activities. Those bittersweet memories running around the field with my cousins and enjoying playtime regardless of how sunny it was or even how bad the rain is about the get. When I was young all I could remember is having a bunch of cousins who I can rely on even now and how amazing it was running away from the grasp of our grandparents. We were all just a year apart from each other and it has really brought us to a close knitted family. At a given time my grandparents would take care of kids age ranging from 8 - 9 grandkids each with their unique personality and wants.

Celebrating Birthday's together was a thing last time because there is so many of us! Big family things.
Left to Right: Cousin Edwin , Myself, Cousin Kelvin and Cynthia

Celebrating my 4 Birthday with my cousins. It is always fun with these bunch. So glad to be doing life with them. One of the few occasions last time that I was keen on letting my grandparents and parents putting a dress on me. Hahahah.

All my youngest days I lived with my grandparents looking after me in a small neighborhood in Malaysia known as Kajang which is in the state of Selangor. At some occasions, it feels that I'm more of a Selangor person than a Kl person. Well, one thing about this neighborhood is the famous satay Kajang. I grew up eating them and savoring the true taste of satay. I’m the youngest and the cheekiest out of 3 wonderful children that my parents have.

The perks of being the youngest in the family, you get to travel with your parents when you're siblings were busy with their college education. Here's a small close to heart memory with my parents in "Taj Mahal" India. Hint: I'm a Daddy's girl
From Left to Right: Myself, Papa Rao and Mama Rao

Birthday's was really a big thing back then.
From Left to right: Brother Hendry, Mama Rao, Myself and Sister Sarrah.

As bubbly as I was when I was young, I couldn’t keep up with my cousins solely because of my medical condition. Apparently, I was diagnosed with Asthma when I was an infant. Well if that was a bummer for my active lifestyle, I had this common thing that comes along with asthma is whereby your heart's condition is shaped like a pigeon’s chest. Well that didn’t stop me much but just set me back a little in terms of sports and kid's cravings when growing up.

That’s when I developed the thoughts and the feeling that I’m always going to be an underdog when it comes to any fast moving activities. Back then we cousins used to have league soccer matches as we were all die-hard fans of two major soccer team which is Manchester United and Liverpool. I am a proud supporter of Manchester and will always be. When we used to play our league games back then I was always the substitute that was not subbed at any point. It felt like I was just sitting there staring into black space.Little kid in me slowly started thinking that “maybe this is how life supposed to be”

Image Source : https://twitter.com/dkshnt

I could still recall the amount of things that I could not do be it sports or food. All those restrictions somewhat build up a sneaky young kid on her cheat day that moments later would regret her choices. Well I guess I was living up to the YOLO motto. We had seasons where we were all into playing soccer and at times we switch things up into playing rounders.

Given the circumstances and my parents caring for their young kid, I was usually lectured by my folks. But I totally get it now that I’m off the age I am now. I slowly started to channel my frustration towards food, food became my go-to companion when I’m sad. Eventually, I got caught up in a spiral where I had this love-hate relationship with food. I begin turning myself towards food be it a good occasion or a bad one.

It's only when I was in my teen years that I realize what damage have I been doing to myself. I was constantly living in a shell of fear and judgments by people surrounding me. I was slightly on the chubby side when I was in high school. It dawns on me that I was always going to be a loser. My teenage life was a constant battle of trying to find my self-worth as a human being. It came to a point where it was all crashing around me, being called names, mouthed because you’re not the ideal kind of a cool kid around. Slowly I developed body image problems and lost most of my confidence.

THE CHANGE HAPPENED;

One day it all changed, I decided that I had enough. It's time to take things into my own hands. At the age of 14 I enrolled in Karate-Do, I started getting active all over again. I picked up more sports that I could ever imagine. I did hockey, netball, volleyball and bullet ejection. It was just very adrenaline pumping, I for once loved how I felt about myself. I represented my school in hockey tournaments, volleyball and bullet ejections. I felt so good about myself.

You may wonder or even ask, what’s different or what changed?

Well for me what changed was my encounter and personal breakthrough that I was worth it! Worth it enough for effort and I’m worth the love that was showered upon me. It totally changed my perspective on life, I self-pitied less and did what was seemingly right at that time. All this happened not by my own strength, I definitely had the friendly backup from Jesus!

I started taking responsibility for my actions, I take steps that could prevent me from falling sick. I learn more about how my body works and what would or could potentially trigger my body. I learn to love myself and that was the first step that I took that brought me out of my shell, that brought me out of my “underdog” mentality that I could not accomplish anything that I’ve started.

Slowly I started to see the change around me, I was a genuinely happier person and it thought me that if I could only see pass through the hurdles before me, I could conquer mountains. All those comments on me being on the chubbier side didn’t hurt that much anymore because I know deep down beneath all those words coming out from their mouth is the love and care they have for me.

Being chubbier of fat doesn’t make you any less of a human than the other and the same rule applies to those individuals out there with being underweight. You can only see things differently only if you begin to love yourself and allow yourself to feel the love others have for you.

You are only what you think you are. If you could set your mind unto doing something surely one day you could achieve things. Because not everybody success or failure is similar. You are unique and you are different in God’s eyes.

Now, all these long backgrounds I’m yet to tell you who I am;

I’m Bethany Xandria Rao Francis and you can call me Beth. I’m not an Underdog but I’m a OverComer! What you just read was just a mere journey on what happened in my life so far. Stay tuned for more updates from me.
A big shout out to @rayraymy and @danielwong for introducing Steemit to me!