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RE: We are Family Protection, Keeping Families Safe, Together.

in #introducemyself7 years ago (edited)

Thank you for this initiative. I've had personal involvement with social services when my ex husband and I were going through our divorce. (We're back together now and he's been clean ever since but that's beside the point) I started dating someone whose best friend was a social worker when my husband and I were separated and he encouraged me to call cps when my ex started getting into meth. I was anxious about calling because I had a feeling it would backfire and sure enough, it did. They put conditions on me that I had to follow in order for me to keep them, like a mental health assessment and "adequate furniture." The social worker noted ridiculous findings like "the 3 year old wets the bed" (I mean c'mon, she was 3, so I just put a pull up on her at night.) I was staying at a shelter before I got my house back and the legal advocate there told me even the District Attorney said that I shouldn't have to adhere to the conditions they placed on me. All the kids had to be taken to the clinic, where hair samples were taken and blood was drawn. They all had to strip down naked and I had to fill out a lengthy questionaire about their cognitive development. I needed to keep all their dental and routine checkup appointments and call within 3 days of losing a job, changing a phone number, any change in my life. They tried to talk me into vaccines but I didn't budge. Eventually I was assigned a new social worker. She was great: she gave me goodwill vouchers when I moved back into my house for household things I needed and was given a Walmart giftcard to spend on other things like bedding, then one day I get a letter in the mail saying "no further court involement needed." She dropped the case. It was a two sided coin: they took my children out of an unsafe environment when I had no other legal means to do so but they can be so arbitrary, one social worker can differ from another and I can see how decent families can get caught up in the nightmare. The man I was dating told me a story about his social worker friend giving one woman another chance "because she liked her." It made me so angry, that's not how the world is supposed to work.

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You dodged a bullet there by eventually being assigned a Social Worker who wasn't evil.
Yes, each Social Worker can pretty much do whatever they please -- forget all the guidelines and laws.

If you ever want to write up a post about your experiences, please tag it as #familyprotection so that we easily find it.

I did also gain some of insight into how it all works since my boyfriend's best friend was a social worker. She told him I wasn't on their radar at all, yet I felt had to jump through hoops to keep the kids. Anything you say will be used against you because they have to cover their bases. They don't even have to follow their own rules. For example I was supposed to grant a home visit once a month but there were months where I was completely left alone. Even though each social worker is different they all know each other's cases because they rotate who is on call on the weekend-at least here in my city... I think I will write a post about it all eventually, thank you. :)

So sorry to hear your nightmare story here. I hope you are together with your children now and can find support in any other place but with social services. Not called the SS for nothing!!!

I'm so grateful that things turned out the way they did...our family is completely restored and there is no longer any social services involvement.

That is amazingly good news!

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