I think it takes some level of emotional maturity to see anger, or any emotion as a choice. There are many people who never gain this level and live out their lives ruled by emotion. I suppose that could be a whole topic in itself.
I use to really avoid anger in myself as well as others. Then I heard somewhere that anger is just another expression of hurt. It can be hard to do at times, but if I remember to look at it like that and try to find the source of the hurt feelings it helps a lot.
Yes, and isn't it interesting that people who live by their emotions seem to think it's perfectly fine to do that. They are the same people who believe that other people can 'make' them feel a certain way. And are likely to be people who enjoy the 'drama and trauma' in their lives. Which goes back to the whole emotional maturity thing.
I remember talking to a friend, complaining about someone and at some point she must have gotten tired of hearing it. She looked at me and said, "Get over it." I was shocked! My first thought was hey, I'm looking for a little sympathy here! Second thought was, wait, I can do that? Just get over it and move on? That one simple comment from years ago has helped me so much!
I believe too that anger is the quick response to hiding hurt. Easier to be angry than step back and look inside.
Really good insights, thank you!