Diary game

Greetings everyone, welcome to my diary game and I'll like to share some thoughts I usually have when I am alone. (And I am almost always alone so you can imagine how many times I have these thoughts 😂).
Growing up, my parents put so much restrictions on us and one of them was we were not allowed to have friends. No visiting and no being visited. I hated this particular restriction because I did not have the chance to do the things my age mates were allowed to.

It did not really upset me at that time but now, I really wished things were different because it shaped my life in a way I am still trying to accept.

I became an introvert. Since reading was the only thing we were allowed to do, I developed a liking for novels. Unfortunately, my parents did not support that as well so I read them in hiding.
I did not know how to dance, to interact with people, to maintain a conversation, I had low self esteem, anger issues and all what not.

I was always alone and I did not like it but then I did not like to be around people either. It made me really sad. I never was close to anyone till date because I never felt a sense of belonging.
When I am alone, I will talk to myself about a while new life where I'm not the way I am.

After reading books akd listening to intelligent people talk, I realized I'll forever have this life and I needed to accept it inorder to love forward. I also realized that I had to start looking at the bright side of my upbringing.
I realized that if I am not the center of attention then I'll not feel like I belong ( I don't know how to remedy that).
So on the bright side, my upbringing taught me a lot. I became very intelligent, smart, fast in every aspect (walking, talking, typing, writing, reading, comprehending), I also gained knowledge in table birds and piggery.

Back to my diary game, I came for tutorials and realized that someone else was teaching the course I was supposed to because I came late. I sort of felt left out because I was not point of attention. Then it triggered these thoughts.

Me back from tutorials 😊