RE: A different kind of nostalgia!
Looking into the past is like turning your back on the present and the future. And all you have is "here and now." Until you find meaning in your day today, until you set meaningful goals, you will keep longing for the past, and this will drain your energy. Transform the grief for the days gone by and the children they once were into a source of inspiration! When you look back at the past, you don’t see the “now,” and you’re not moving toward the future. "Today" and "now," one day will be "the past," and you will long for that lost past - wouldn't it be better to fill your heart with “now”? Write every day in a gratitude diary to stay in the Here and Now. There is such a spiritual practice! Nostalgia is a protective mechanism for our emotional state. For those suffering from mild or moderate depression, a moderate dose of nostalgia can improve their mood, but for those suffering from severe depression, it’s not recommended. Happy memories from the past tend to sadden depressed people even more, and it’s clear they cannot connect their present self with the happier self of the past. I notice that you make comparisons, and that worsens your state! I have no idea if you’re depressed, but think carefully about everything. Take a piece of paper and a pen (or, if it's more comfortable, write on a computer or laptop...) and be completely honest with yourself. Ask yourself what you had then that you don’t have now? What do you miss, what triggers such tears... Once you start, you’ll learn a lot about yourself. I advise you to work with a psychotherapist if this state persists. We will always feel nostalgia for something from the past. In each stage of our lives, the positive emotions from the previous stages will turn into new causes for nostalgia. And this is part of all our lives. The question is: where does it lead you toward joy and strength to move forward, or toward regret and sorrow? Best Regards 🍀
Hi there,
Thank you so much for your genuine concern and such a thorough reply. It truly means a lot to me.
I’m not sure if it’s the translation or just me, or I feel I haven’t expressed myself eloquently. The message in my words are simply a way to convey how, in our longing for our children to grow up and become independent, we sometimes forget to live in the present — just as you said, we should focus on the present.
Let me assure you that I’m not depressed, but I truly appreciate your concern. You could say I got a little emotional, but that doesn’t mean I’m living in the past or not enjoying the present. Perhaps it’s better to say that a person is nothing without their memories, and this is simply my way of cherishing those beautiful moments. Yes, I do cry when I get emotional—it’s just how I express myself, sometimes.
I cherish every moment I had with my parents during my childhood, and I treasure every moment I have with my children—past, present, and, hopefully, in the future as well.
It’s a strange, bittersweet ache that comes with cherishing your children’s childhood. On one hand, it fills your heart with joy to see them grow, learn, and blossom into who they’re meant to be. On the other, there’s an undeniable tug at your soul—a quiet longing for those fleeting moments when they were little, when their tiny hands clung to yours, when their world revolved entirely around you.
It’s not sadness, really. It’s the realization that time is a relentless force, moving forward without pause. It’s the awareness that while you are grateful for the present, the memories of their giggles, first steps, and endless questions are treasures you’ll always carry...
I'm babbling again. Lol. But you get what I am trying to say ;)))
Thank you so much for stopping by and looking out for me. 🍀
Thank you!
Well, I hope this nostalgia brings you joy. Otherwise... There are a few red flags in what’s written, so I allowed myself to reply to you. Regards
For me, it’s about thinking fondly of a past time! So yes, it brings joy, evokes emotions, and makes me appreciate enjoying and savoring every moment — owning both my past and present. All of that. :)
Thank you for your reply. I truly appreciate the concern, and it did give me a new perspective on things. However, depression is thankfully not part of the picture. Perhaps there's a bit of anxiety, the anxiousness (maybe) of seeing my children preparing for their practical lives, and the accompanying worry. But no, not depression.
You're trying to be the better @bambuka ;-))) Well written!