What's with Moon and Melancholy?

^{What's with moon and melancholy?
(Super Moon sighted on Aug 19, 2024)}

The last two weeks have been tough. I don't want to stop writing (again) because steem is the only therapeutic activity in my life currently. I try not to post something here just for the sake of posting, which explains a slight decrease in my activity. I don't even have the energy to comment sometimes. Please forgive me if I haven't replied to your thoughtful comment, I promise, I will get back to you soon.

Whatever I write here has to come from my heart which is overwhelmed with its own set of worries. The other day I had a panic attack - I couldn't breathe. Luckily, I realized what was happening and soon calmed myself down.

I couldn't figure out what was bothering me. Maybe it was not a single thing. Multiple things thrown at once aggravated my nerves.

Stage 5 Parkinson's Disease Dementia patient at home, pre-schooler giving a hard time due to separation anxiety, social commitments, needing help round the clock but mostly handling everything alone, not being able to have much time for myself, very little sleep and respite.

I'm physically and emotionally drained.

As if this isn't enough, news these days takes a toll on mental health, too. My problems will eventually be solved (probably sooner than expected); there's hope, at least. I comfort myself with these thoughts.

^{"The moon sings to me a sweet lullaby and I surrender knowingly to her sad melody, for I too miss the sun."
(S.L Heaton)
The night before Super Moon - Aug 18, 2024}

I am worrying about my child who cries when it's time for school, and there's a child of the same age in Palestine who's crying because he has none of his family alive. I can't even imagine that for my child. I can't even think of what the other kid is going through. His childhood is stolen.

I can't shake the image of him from my mind which suddenly appeared on the screen while casually browsing social media.

And then another news about a doctor from India who was gang-raped and brutally killed while on duty. This world is not safe for women and minors.

And one more piece of news about a woman in my country recklessly driving a car while high on drugs smashed into other vehicles took 3 lives and left several injured.

What this world has become? Or was it always something like this. I have always despised monarchy, thinking that a bad ruler is the demise of nation. There's no justice, and anyone could get a death sentence for as simple a reason as crossing the path of 7-year-old princes.

It turns out democracy is nothing better. All these heinous crimes and wars are still happening, and it looks like nobody is answerable to anyone. Everyone is the king, not just figuratively.

I try to avoid news and fast-paced social media as much as I can but it's not possible all the time. Especially when I was looking for a way of distraction from problems in my personal life which now seem trivial.

I love Steem for its slow-paced environment, unlike other social media. Something which others want to change but I think of it as a blessing in disguise.

My thoughts are not aligned these days. So, bear with me and my melancholy until I'm organized mentally and domestically.