ANOTHER Exciting Post in the BORING Life of 'ME'...
It isn't easy writing about yourself on Social Media, when you're not overtly vain, egotistical or just plain psychopathic in nature... like me.
For this reason, I know my life is pretty hum-drum boring and sometimes feel bad to share most of it with my online friends. I mean, after all... it can be tortuous reading some of those longgggggggggg dragged out posts from equally boring people we stumble across here and on other sites.
Come on... I know you feel the same way as me about reading most peoples daily posts- with the exception of MINE, (Of course) because I fill it with a lot of exaggerations and outright lies in order to make my dumb existence on the planet a bit more interesting :>)
How can you hate a liar, when they are honest about lying...?!?!?!? In that situation, the liar is a mere 'story teller'; they're not trying to fool anyone, trick you into thinking your life sucks in comparison to theirs...
Imagine if I wrote the truth about my plain, ordinary, day-to-day life that was boring as hell and it seemed really interesting to someone? They would certainly have a serious problem, if that was the case. I'd feel terribly sorry for them. More sorry for them then I do for myself...!!!
It's like -- for instance - - Today I woke up, then climbed out of bed. Put my slippers on, then shuffled over to the toilet bowl and took a leak. After that, I strolled into the kitchen, brewed some coffee and plopped down in front of my laptop to check the cryptocurrency market at 'World Coin Index'.
Pretty boring... right...??? Is that what you do too? If so, then why the hell would you find the start of my day any more interesting than yours? Why the hell would you want to read about it either?
I DON'T THINK YOU WOULD... That's why I need to lie about my life AND... YOU SHOULD LIE ABOUT YOURS TOO...!!! If you want to make people happy to see a post appear from you in their 'friends feed'
This is the kind of sane and sound advice we never read about here on Steemit from those people who like to give all of us advice on how to make our accounts grow... They're always so boring TOO... Why the hell would any of us want to read that boring message over-and-over-and-over again...?!?!?!?!?
JUST LIE...!!! Damnit... (Unless of course your life is actually interesting)
Then maybe you'll attract more anxious readers to your posts; who actually READ what you wrote and reward you with plenty of lucrative up-votes. You'll be able to retire in no time, if you follow my advice... buy a yacht and sail around the world from port to port, with a smile upon your face.
One thing though, to keep in mind... you have to make your lies really interesting and easy to read. It helps to show fake pictures about your fake life too. Otherwise, people might figure out that you're fake and not believe you EVER... even when you're NOT being fake. That would be disastrous...!!!
Does this make sense to you...? I certainly hope so. Otherwise, I just wasted a whole post and some precious time, lying about all this crap I just wrote -- to try and help someone!!!
I'm going to go to bed now. I have about six sexy, young women waiting impatiently and calling to me from the bedroom. Usually, there are only three or four ladies laying in wait, but tonight they brought friends :>)
If you want to find out how it all worked out, be sure to keep an eye out for my next post . Where I'll grace you with some more lies to brighten up your day.
Ciao
This post is painfully honest. That's not a lie. 😀😎
I wish that I hadn't fallen asleep on the sofa.