The Autistic Unfiltered

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Fuente

I heard a phrase, autistic people cannot relate or cannot have a conversation with someone else because of their lack of filter, that is, they throw what they think without measuring any consequence of what they are saying (this does not mean that it is a rule that is the same for everyone) we have explained how diverse this disorder or spectrum is, and what can or cannot affect certain areas to those who have it, but in reality, what is this lack of filter based on?

Asking several autistic adults why they say things that can hurt others and their answers were very varied and sharp. "I don't understand that she says I only tell the truth" "I am not to blame that people want me to lie to her when they preach that Christ died for the truth", "I say things as I think them, I cannot be thinking about the susceptibility of others" "but it is the truth" "I feel sorry for her, she must understand that why lie to herself, if the truth will always prove him right"

Things like these are very painful for many of us, I live with two high-functioning people and it is hard to hear things said when both are right and defend it, I choose not to get involved because I would surely get hurt.

It's like being in a crossfire where the bullet can hit you at any moment. That's when that "No autistic filter" comes to our mind, which many say is good, well. To some degree, you can have a high-functioning friend and see them once a month and enjoy their lack of filter but living with two is different, and living with one is hard. Because you don't know what to expect when it comes to anything, from when the food is bad, after spending hours preparing it, to telling you that he was thinking when you die, that obviously things can change, but it's something that I must think I'm going to die" hahahahahahaha these things happened a lot as a child now I think he understands that the day he dies he will have a void in his life (well I think so).

Among the many characteristics we are going to find this one, of being extremely sincere, saying things without fear of hurting or hurting the other person, and to a certain degree it is and should be so, but from a young age we are taught to lie or to be diplomatic, to maintain manners and not to tell others what really needs to be said so as not to hurt their feelings.

In my experience with Elias, because as we obtained a diagnosis from a very young age we began with all these corrections, he does not disguise what he wants to say, but he has learned to look at me, look to the sides, turn around and leave, because he wants to let go of what he is wearing, and it is a great advance.

I know that he wants to express his rejection of injustice, of what is done wrong to protest and he has learned when and how to do it, without this causing him to get tired, he once told me: "you don't know how exhausting it is that you can't say what you feel"

It is important that mom and dad understand this, that sometimes it is not that they are rude and responsive, well it depends on age, adolescence (this is another case) but in most it is the need not to lie, and we should not contaminate their lives and make them understand that lying is easier or that it is a tool to get what they want. Sincerity is something that gives value to the human being, only that we must understand that an autistic person is not rude, I repeat, it is simply that he sees things differently, and it is logical. Isn't his question valid: Why lie?

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