You have a flashy start and your story is good but I miss the part where you describe in short what you see on the picture (words, no sentences or assumptions, are enough) and next what you feel if you look at the picture (see what is asked the contest of @freewritehouse).

If you like to see some examples you can have a look at the entries of @solperez and @blessedlife, there will for sure be more so visit some other entries and share you expertises.

A great day to you and happy writing!

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