How do You Deal with People who Speak Ill of you Behind Your Back?"

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Hello! fellow Steemians and friends. I'm delighted to be part of this contest to express my view points on the topic

It's indeed a sad experience when you face with the decision of dealing with people who speak evil about you behind your back. Especially when you have a humane heart that you don't want to intentionally hurt another person like you yet you find this rumour mongers around you pretending to like you but at the back they bite and drag you to the mud.

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Personally I feel it very painful and even used to shade tears, get angry to the extent of wanting to go legally to court for defamation charge. There has always been a mix-up of different emotions and actions to be taken each time I face this. But in the end I would just let it go, that is not without personally reinforcing myself to a new change which I'll explain later.

I have been imagining why some people would cook up lies, spread it across just to to tarnish the image of another person. In some cases, the tale bearers can find little information about you and they go about exaggerating it to suit their fake storytelling career, this they do to appear good while the other person is going down. Because believe me or not this word spread is capable of evoking public criticism, dislike and look down on one's personality.

I can't keep count of my personal experiences I have had for years being falsely accuse of and ill-spoken about. I have two sisters who have done this to me. They strongly affirm that I do this and said that, spread the allegation to others whereas all these allegations are all lies. In fact one really engaged in a campaign of calumny, assassinating my character by continuously spoken I'll about me for nearly a decade. For all these she never confronted me, spoken to me physically nor do I ask her.

I take the following steps in dealing with those spoken I'll of me at the back:

No open confrontation and I would not also frown my face with you, I'ld pretend I never hear nor seen yet I'll own up to pull myself together and set boundaries.

I handle it with absolute maturity and diplomatically giving the gossip a social distance of more than 50cm spacious enough to accommodate only good morning and walk away. I give no room for discussing closely with this kind of people. I avoid them at the slightest chance but won't keep them malice.

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I act as neither friends nor enemy such in such a manner that the backbiter notices this change in me and asks why but I won't disclose anything, I just would't be stupid enough to allow this kind of double mouth dog near my life to backstab me over and over again. The relationship would become lukewarm till it dies along the way.

I reinforce positive behaviour and thinking into me. I boost myself esteem by believing myself even when others wouldn't believe me. I don't let whatever someone says negatively about me to affect my wellbeing, though it used to be tough bearing it. I free my mind from negative energy and move on understanding that, rumours are carried by haters and accepted by fools.

To be ill-spoken of is a very bad thing that provokes so many emotions. Some can send you to a pool of anger, tears, madness planning to do stupid and terrible things once you hear it. Ill spoken language can demean, defame, bring down one's reputation from the high esteem of members of the public.

I had always have very unexplained feelings once I'm being badly spoken of especially on things I don't do or say. What I do when they speak ill about me at the back is to ignore them, I would never let them come very near to me again. I make sure I don't give them any close space in my life, I may never ask them anything and would pretend I don't hear or know their babbles but what I carefully do is to cut oof from them .

I am inviting @okere-blessing, @ruthjoe , @eveetim to join me in the contest.