Contest: My personal perspectives about courtship.
Hello great steemians, I well you all to my blog as I am participating in this nice and interesting contest which discusses about courtship.
What is your understanding about the word courtship?
Courtship can be refers to the process of building a romantic relationship between a man and a woman typically with the intention of getting marriage. This process involves getting to know each other very will including his likes and dislike as well as the other party, demonstrating affection and interest, as well as developing emotional intimacy to the intending spouse.
Courtship do not start in our days, it has always been but the way it was practice then was different and I can call that to be traditional courtship which
Including;
Spending time together to have one to one conversation, doing some activities togther, and the wife to be visiting the mother in law to be and helping out in some activities and they are carefully watching and scrutinising her.
While the groom to be showing her affection and attention by giving her some gifts, care and show his commitment by proposing to her.
There is also modern courship which is done through online dating, casual relationships and so on.
The aim of courship is to establish a deep and emotional connection with your to be mate, building trust, laying foundation for a healthy and happy family, having mutual understanding and a fulfilling relationship.
An healthy courtship should have trust, respect, communication, emotional intimacy compatibility and shared values as its key aspects.
Courtship is not always performed the same way in all places, it can be influenced by the culture and traditions as well as personal and social courtship thereby making it a unique experience.
How can people in courtship maintain a good relationship that can lead to marriage?
A lot of effort is required before one can maintain a healthy courtship that will lead to marriage.
Commitment, effective communication, honesty, openness, accountability and emotional intelligence.
The intending couple must hear out each other and try to understand each other's perspectives as well as sharing thoughts, concern, feelings and desires.
They must be truthful and transparent not hiding anything from their intending mate.
They should engage in activities together and align lifes objectives and values.
They should be open about their finances, past present and in the future.
They should learn to show empathy to one another, manage owned emotions and avoid drama.
They should seek wisdom from experienced couples and surround themselves with good people who will influence them positively.
They should have a sincere discussion about their finances such as spending and saving.
They should try and have an align expectations so that there will not be crisis after marriage.
If intending couple focus on the areas mentioned aboved, they will build a strong foundation in their courtship which can lead to marriage.
Are there things to be hidden during courtship? If yes what are they. If No back your answers with your reasons.
During courtship transparency and honesty are
very important though there are some personal information that may be kept private for some reasons. Such information can be shared gradually considering how deep there are in the relationship, timing and the potential impact in the relationship.
Some times it can be wise to keep the following information private at the early stage of courtship.
★ Sharing past trauma and sensitive experience too soon ca be overwhelming and burdensome at the initial stage.
★ Dicussing financial struggles and debt at the early stage can bring unnecessary stress.
★ Health problems and medical conditions should be shared on when there is mutual trust and understanding.
★ It is not wise to talk about past relationships in details, one should focus on current relationship and how to make it grow.
There are also some things you shouldn't hide from your intending spouse during courtship. There are;
¤ Your values and beliefs
¤ Your expectations in the marriage
¤ Deal breakers and non negotiable
¤ Short and long term goals
¤ Emotional capacity and availability
¤ Aspirations
Share sensitive information when;
♥︎ Trust is well established and when that is necessary for the growth of the relationship.
♥︎ You are mutually comfortable to do so do not hide essential aspects.
♥︎ Your are seeking support and guidance be it from your intending spouse or experience and wise couples.
♥︎ Share sensitive information when addressing potential concerns.
In all you do, prioritise honesty, mutual respect and transparency.
Do you think there's time frame in courtship? Explain.
There is no particular timeline for courtship but what will help guide the process is having a general
framework.
◆ You can use the first one to three months to get to know each other, share interest and values, engage in casual dating and conversations.
◆ The next three to six months can be use for deeper conversations and emotional intimacy, building and developing trust as well as sharing activities and experiences.
◆ Then 6 months to one year can be use to assess long term plans, goals, values and expectations discussion. One can decide to meet each other's families during the first year in courtship.
◆ One to two years can be use for making commitment, planning for the future, proposal and engagement.
Additionally
★ Age, maturity, cultural and social background, emotional readiness, commitment, personal goals, communication, emotional readiness, and conflict resolution skills can influence courtship duration.
★ Time frames in courtship is important because will prevent unnecessary prolonging and uncertainties.
★ It will encourage relationship growth and helps build anticipation for the future.
Is courtship a guarantee for successful marriage.
Courtship is not a guarantee for a successfulmarriage but it can help lay a strong foundation for a healthy relationship thereby contributing to a successful marriage.
There are some reasons why courtship may not lead to a successful marriage and some of those reasons are;
- Unexpected life eventt and challenges
- Incompatibility and lifestyle
- Expectations that are not realised
- Third party pressures
- Lack of communication and so on.
For courtship to lead to a successful marriage one must
- Maintain a good flow of communication
- Be emotional intelligence and show empathy
- Show mutual respect, love and trust
- Be adaptable and resilence
Courtship is very important for building a strong foundation for a successful marriage and couples who work hard during their days of courtship often enjoy thier marriage at the long run though it is not a guarantee for a successful marriage.
To enjoy our marriage after courtship, we need to continue nurturing intimacy and and connection showing our marriage partner that we care.
At this point, I am inviting @ruthjoe, @josepha and @ninapenda to take part in this contest.
You have a strong experience of which you have poured it out, I was just nodding through all the lines in this post and I can agree with you that it's not everything that should be talked about in courtship I'm happy you mentioned few of them. Unless you understand the temperament and behavior of your partner to great extent. Your conclusion summaries everything and I love your post. Cheers dear friend.
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Thank you dear friend for your kind words and commendation.
Nice to hear that nurturing intimacy and connection in marriage after courtship is a factor for a successful marriage,congratulations and success in your entry dear friend.