Bullies In Your Locality, How Can The Kids Win Over Them – Peer pressure!

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You asked for my input… well, here it is!

Hard to believe but this has been the meaning of the word “bully” over the years. How did it start from being a sweetheart to a coward? I can just shake my head as it is hard to believe that the meaning of a word can change like this.

My own kids are parents themselves therefor I asked my stepson about his opinion on bullying. He is twelve year old boy, very talented and who, I believe, is growing up in a stable and very religious family.

I could believe what he told me. In fact, I was shocked.

Q: Have you been bullied before
A: Yes, often.

Q: By whom?
A: My friends.

Q: Where did it happen?
A: At school and also after school.

Q: Why did they bully you?
A: I didn’t want to do what they wanted me to do.

Q: Does bullying happen often?
A: All most everyday one of us are bullied.

Q: Why did you not tell us about it?
A: I am scared that you will phone his parents he will bully me more and tell everybody in the school.

From his answers on all the questions I asked and what we discussed I can agree with my fellow Steemians that there are indeed four types of bullying;

1. Physically – to break someone’s things or to physically hit someone
2. Verbally – calling a person by a bad name and saying ugly things
3. Socially – to spread untrue rumours and to tell others not to play with that person
4. Cyber – using the internet, social media and mobile phone to bad mouth a person

For me it was also a case that bullying and peer pressure goes hand in hand. Kids choose not to do what their friends want them to do, putting pressure on themselves.

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Q: What do you think is peer pressure?
A: It is when your friends want you to do something and you don’t want to do.

Q: Do you think peer pressure can be good for you?
A: Nope!

It is important that the kids must understand what peer pressure is.

• It is the direct or indirect impact that others of your age, friends, family members and communities can have on your life
• Peer pressure plays a huge influence in how you act and what you believe
• Peer pressure can be positive. This when you have friends who support you and who cares for you
• Peer pressure can be negative. This is when you have bad friends who doesn’t support nor care for you. They normal pressure you to do bad things to fit in
• If you can handle peer pressure most like the bullying will stop
• Friends can make you or break you!

Q: What do you want me to tell you more about? How can I help you?
A: Tell what I must do. I’m not sure what is right when my friends ask me to do things that I don’t want to do.

Here follows my advice to him;

How to handle being bullied

🔹 Ignore he/her/ them
🔹 Walk away
🔹 Don’t fight back
🔹 Be prepared
🔹 Stay in a group
🔹 Don’t show that you are scared
🔹 Write down when, what and how
🔹 TELL SOMEONE!

How to handle peer pressure

🔸 Just say… NO!
🔸 Make a joke. My mom has eyes in the back of her head, she will know
🔸 Give a reason why you think it is a bad plan
🔸 Find an excuse
🔸 Make a different suggestion
🔸 Repeat yourself if necessary
🔸 Tell your friends that it is something that you are not interested in

Just when I thought we were finished for the day he asked me;
“How do I say no?”

The best way I could tell him was to give him a few examples on how he can say no.

• “Not today, maybe another day”
• “I cannot do it, my dad will kill me”
• “I don’t feel like it”
• ”I’m not going to do it and you are not going to change my mind”
• “You know I don’t do things like that”

I've come to the conclusion that being a child in today’s environment is not easy.

Kids, love your parents, respect your parents and share with them when things are not going right!

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