If I could start over, I would be a Rastafarian - by @whatsthatcryptom

I hear you thinking, that is not a job. Nope, that is exactly why I want to be one. Let me explain.

I am millennial, fuck that shit

You have likely heard about the term millennial. Well, I am a millennial. Which means I am in my 30s and am actually at my best. This is scary stuff. I absolutely don't feel I have achieved that much and knowing that it only goes downhill from here scares the shit out of me.

Little whatsthatcryptom

It started at approximately almost nearly close to 35 years ago. This boy was born in a nest full of love and care. Nothing would keep me from growing up like a decent man, have a good job, my own happy family. My dad was a respected man in our community, and all eyes were on his 2 adopted kids. Me, and my sister. The pressure was on.

When I was young I felt ok with that, I liked to achieve and the fact that I had to perform didn't daunt on me. This changed though. The rise of Facebook, later Linkedin and Twitter made people look more at other people and what they do in life. Everywhere I looked I saw people selling themselves, make better versions of themselves while they are actually miserable as fuck.

Big Brother is a wanker

Everything you do is public. Every grade, or non-grade. Every beer you drink with your friends, every fart you secretly let go. Nothing is private and the constant pressure of being better than you actually are made me have a burnout multiple times know. The shrink says its something I will carry with me until my career is over. And then I will have the Retirement syndrome and likely go completely mental. Sounds awesome.

I sit here for weed & beer source

Why Rasta?

For that reason, and the reason I like to smoke weed, like to listen to reggae music, love not washing my hair and dislike hairdressers in general, love wearing clothes that come straight from a thrift store, love to chill, don't mind free love, think Haile Selassie is dope, like organic food, love the land, free spirit, don't give a fuck about giving a fuck etc.. Taking this all into consideration, I feel like becoming a Rastafarian is the only option for me.

Can I still become a Rasta?

Fuck yeah!! Why not? I believe you can become anything in life. You just have to want it bad enough. Then learn a skill that will get you closer to that and hustle the fuck around. Its simple. 95% of the people don't want their dream bad enough, I think that is the key to everything. Martin Luther King had a dream, and fuck did he wanted it badly. He got it.

How I can train myself to become a real Rasta?

Except for wanting my dream harder than 95% of the other douchebags who have the same dream as me, I will also need some skills and a role model to look up to and to copy his behavior.
I googled a little bit on how to become a rasta and the internet tells me I have to stop washing my hair, likely just uninstall the shower completely. Go to the nearest thrift store to get me a rasta hat and some oversized colorful clothes. The next stop will be the local dealer and get twice as much cannabis as usual. Then smoke it pure and pass out twice. Get completely lazy and do this for a few months until nearly all functional brain cells are numb.

I feel I can make it.

My entry for the challenge by @steemingcurators