Holiday dinners as a vegan - past & present

For the 4 years that I’ve been vegan, I have always dreaded attending family dinners (or group dinners in general) - especially holiday themed ones. I’d always be asked the same questions like: What do you eat? Where do you get your protein? Don’t you miss the taste of meat? etc. It seemed like the questions wouldn’t end until I left the house.

I’d hear the same jokes and be made fun of year after year. I would be treated like the weird one… for not eating animal flesh or their by-products. I always wondered why I couldn’t just blend in, to eat my food like everyone else, and enjoy conversation that’s not based on what I’m eating.

The type of food at my family dinners were all animal product based. There usually wasn’t even a side dish of vegetables that did not contain butter. The first couple of years I would request my grandma to omit animal products from vegetable dishes, but she never really wanted to “sacrifice the taste of the meal” for the rest of the family. This is when I started to bring my own food to family gatherings - and I brought enough to share with them. This was to ensure that I had something to eat that didn’t have animal products in it, and to show them that plant based / vegan foods can be very tasty as well. Once I started doing this, I heard a lot less criticism from my family, and they were able to start understanding what I was saying when explaining the reasons for eating and living this way. My grandmas & cooks of the family were initially offended that I didn’t want to eat what they prepared, but they started to understand my reasoning after a couple years of being vegan.

I’m not really the activist type of vegan. I don’t really mention it to people unless I’m asked questions about it. I now enjoy answering questions about veganism when people ask because I’m much more educated on the topic now; and feel comfortable/confident in educating other people. I made it clear to them that I do not appreciate being berated with questions at the dinner table - and will politely ask to talk about it after the meal. I just want to eat in peace.

Unfortunately, I’m the only vegan / plant based person in my family. One aspect of family dinners that still bothers me to this day is knowing that many of my family members are chronically sick with many issues - and still eat ‘foods’ in abundance that contribute to their illnesses. It is very sad for me to watch and experience, especially when I have the knowledge of how to heal the body naturally.

I made the choice to move away for the winter with my partner to Terra Frutis - a fruit based permaculture farm/community in Southern Ecuador. The community is a strictly vegan food only community; so this Christmas dinner was quite the opposite of what I’ve experienced in the past. Back home in Minnesota (USA) the temperatures can drop down to -40 degrees fahrenheit in the winter season, with up to 12+ inches of snow on the ground. While here in Ecuador, the daily average temp is around 80-85 degrees fahrenheit with mostly sunny days and some rain at night time. I have a beautiful view of the mountains/rainforest from the kitchen and, one of the best parts: the people here completely understand and support my choice of being vegan.

Every dish at our Christmas potluck was made only with whole plant-based vegan foods: Fruits, vegetables, nuts/seeds, legumes, or grains. To some people this type of eating may sound limiting or boring - but with at least 50,000 different types of edible plants to eat, one of my favorite pastimes is to create plant based meals & treats with new flavors in the kitchen.
Some of the foods at our potluck included: Fruit salad (papaya, banana, passionfruit, jackfruit), the best mangoes I’ve ever had (pictured), zucchini noodles w/ spicy hemp seed dressing, garlic tahini sauce, tomato/mango dressing, Chanta (palm fruit), steamed sweet potato, cabbage, beets, carrots, Salad made with greens/herbs from the land, & Aguaje (peach palm fruit, pictured).

In conclusion - I’m very grateful for this new experience on Christmas. If you’re having a hard time at family dinners as a new vegan/eating more plant based, just know you are not alone and that it will get better over time. There are many fantastic resources & documentaries for educating and helping people transition to a vegan diet on the internet if you come across someone that is interested. A favorite of mine that comes to mind is ForksOverKnives.

I highly recommend bringing at least one vegan dish to share with the whole family. Our cultures are largely centered around food, and many families use it as a way of connecting. Doing so could also ‘plant a seed’ - inspiring family/friends to try more vegan / plant based foods. So I find it very important to share tasty, creative vegan foods with my family & friends whenever possible - especially during the holiday season dinners!

I hope you have a beautiful New Year :)