Self control: learn to control yourself to achieve your goals
Do you think that your lack of self-control prevents you from achieving your goals? Feel that you are having trouble managing your anger or anxiety? Do you have trouble controlling your emotions, thoughts, or impulses? Would you like to improve your self-control or that of someone close to you? If your answer is yes, this article can help you understand what self-control is and gives you some techniques to improve and increase your self-control.
What is self-control?
Self-control is the skill that allows us to control our emotions, impulses and behaviors, thereby enabling us to achieve our goals and objectives. Self-control is necessary to be successful in the majority of the facets of our life, as for example in the studies, professionally, in our relations.
One could say that self-control is a kind of thermostat that has the function of maintaining our balance and stability, both internally and externally. When it works in a proper way, it helps us to control our impulses and desires that distance us from our goals. For example, if you want to pass an exam, it is necessary to study, whether at home or at the library. For this you need to control your urge to go out spending time with your friends. Another example would be that you wanted to tell his four truths to your boss, but to keep your job you have to control yourself and keep quiet.
Importance of self-checking
It has been shown that people who have high self-control are people who have a higher success rate in their life. This relationship could be due to the influence of emotions on the decision-making process, which ultimately drives our behaviors and impulses, and so to speak our life.
The problem is that when we want something, we have the need to get it in the fastest way possible, and when that is not the case, we stress ourselves, we experience negative emotions, which makes it difficult to manage our emotions or control our anger.
Self-control is therefore a complex skill, so to speak, and it requires the presence of other skills to be able to develop it. More concretely, before we can develop our self-control of our behaviors and impulses, we must: learn to identify our emotions, to understand them, in order to control and manage them, and thus manage our behavior. This allows us to be the master of our decisions, our behaviors and our impulses, master of being able to say how, where and when we channel them. In addition, we must learn to do this with the stress generated by these negative emotions and thoughts, which makes all this much more complicated.
Manage the emotions you feel
This is the last step, one that will allow you to really improve your self-control. The task you need to do is to look for ways to reduce your negative emotional states and their symptoms. Ultimately, it's about finding what suits you to manage your emotions and therefore your behavior. For that, you will have to do a difficult job, but it is worth it. Here are some tips that can help you manage your intense emotions:
- If you have trouble generating negative thoughts and emotions to compensate for the malaise generated by a negative impulse, distance yourself, distract yourself, and then you will be more easy to reduce the stress generated by this situation. For example, you can go out, or leave the place for a few moments, until you feel prepared to face the situation.
- Test yourself. Each experience is a good opportunity to learn how to improve your self-control. Try to be aware of what is going on inside yourself and around you in the different situations of everyday life, and pay attention to the result obtained according to the different actions you perform. For that, you can make a small register in which appear the situations which is interesting and what emotion is related, as well as what you thought about the moment and what you did. This can help you to identify which answer is appropriate for which situation, and which answer is not, as well as to generate new alternatives.
- Finally, it is very important that you are patient, and that you understand that this is not an easy task, so do not get frustrated if you do not get it right away.
If you follow these steps, you will always be closer to self-control, to develop a more balanced and happier life, because remember that your happiness depends on how you interpret and face the reality, and this is of something that depends only on you.
Thank you very much for having read this post, I hope that this article will help you understand about self-control and especially that it will have been useful to you. Feel free to leave your comments and kindly upvote this post.
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