Force the Feeling

When it comes to gratitude, I sometimes have to force the feeling. My thoughts can quickly slip into a negative spiral when it comes to people who have been unkind to me. It is easy to wish harm on someone, but it is better to wish happiness and peace. Not because they deserve it so much as because we deserve to fill our minds with joy.

Practicing gratitude positively effects us on a neurological level. The same is true for practicing negativity. The more we think negative thoughts, the more we will think negative thoughts. It's a habit like swearing. No, I'm not saying curse words are bad. I use them for positive effect all the time, but because I use them frequently on purpose, they also tend to slip on by accident and when it's really not appropriate for me to deploy f-bombs. O_o

Recently I was stuck in a negative loop around a person who has been very cruel to me. It manifested as fear. You can look back at my blog to see some of what I'm talking about. Basically, I became convinced they would hurt me. Here's the thing, they have repeatedly tried to hurt me. Whether they hurt me or not (because they are not nearby physically and because people see them as unstable and hateful) is up to me. I can take their actions personally or I can see them for the self-destructive efforts they are. When I do the latter, I can also take a next step of wishing them peace in their heart.

There is a lot of talk about "putting good out into the world." We can do this with actions like blood donation or charitable giving. We can rake a neighbor's lawn, sing someone's praises, build a house and so on. We can also do this with our thoughts. Thinking positively encourages positive thinking. Positive thinking encourages positive feeling and positive action. I believe this is what that karmic phrase means.

I am absolutely grateful for these kittens.

So, sometimes I force the gratitude. I don't have to like someone to wish good things for them. I don't have to talk to them or about them to think happy thoughts in my head. I sit down and think about what good they've done no matter how small. Then I state out loud that I am grateful for it. Until I mean it. Until I feel it. And when I feel it, I feel better.

What ways do you consciously shift your thinking?

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