XYZ

SCENE ONE
Just entering, John flips the switch on and his living room becomes illuminated. It is a spacious room demarcated into three by different pieces of furniture serving various purposes.
In the first section, there are pieces of “U-shaped” couches facing the electronic gadgets’ shelf Behind the cushon is a dining table and some chairs. Beside these are a table and a chair serving a reading purpose. At the corner close to the reading desk, stands a large stand mirror. On the reading desk sits a blue desk lamp, ready for use.
JOHN (he yawns with his mouth covered by his fisted hand) Aargh! (He looks at his wristwatch) it’s eight pm (He yawns again and sits feebly on a single chair)
Aargh, I am tired! I don’t think I will be able to attend this seminar tomorrow. Let the terrorists continue. Let them kill whoever they want to. I cannot kill myself before they kill me. What, kill me? No.
But... (He picks up the polythene bag that he brought home and brings out a sachet of well-packaged pop-corns. He makes a hole in the nylon of the popcorn; like an invaded city, some popcorns rush out) Oho! (chewing some popcorns) oh! The newspapers I bought on the way. (He pauses. He brings out a pair of shiny spectacles out of its case and wears it) hmmn... hmmn... (He clears his throat and brings out the newspaper from his briefcase. Boldly written on the front page is the motto. “with us, view the world with ease…” The date is also inscribed beside the motto on the frontpage: 30th October, 2013. (He looks at the frontpage pictures obsessively and starts reading the headlines) ‘THE VULTURES GROUP LEADER CAUGHT:

TERRORISM NIPPED IN THE BUD.’ (He stops the reading and jumps with his fists clenched like a soccer player celebrating a long awaited fantastic goal). Yes. This is just what I talked about some minutes ago. Thank you, God.
Before, newspapers always gave ‘testimonies of these terrorists’ evil deeds. Now they are caught. Once the leader is caught, the members are caught too. (He continues reading) Read news at page twenty-five (He stops for a while). I think I need to trail this matter to the end. But before then… (he drops the newspaper and walks tiresomely to the dining table where he lights a gas cooker, fills a stainless steel cup with water and places it on the burner) Oh, I miss Harrison, my good friend. Were he to read this news today, he would feel like this burning flame, because violence and corruption are what he hates so much; although he is too cowardly to involve himself in curbing them. (He After a minute, he attempts to put the water down but the hot cup burns him). Oh no! how hot! Everything has just been working against me lately. Harrison left with no news his whereabouts and now even a cup of water becomes a rebel.
(He flips to page 25 and startles; staring at the newspaper incredulously) who is this? No... it can’t be him. Harrison? (He wipes his face downwards and reads the name below the picture) Harrison. (He wags his head with disbelief) This can’t be true. But... what if it is? (He shakes his head) It can’t. (He pauses).
Aah. . .ah, I don’t need to be troubled about this. Those desperate politicians could play politics with anything. This definitely the handiworks of his father’s political opponents. (he sniffs to confirm the source of the sharp smell he is perceiving. He sneezes, rises, and stumbles as he runs towards the dining to put off the gas. The water in the cup is dried already ) Details (He continues reading the newspaper) “For the past decades, the crime rate in this country had increased geometrically as opposed to the snail-pace arithmetic successes of the country. One of the sharks that stir the pacific ocean of Nigeria’s peace is the Eagles Terrorist Group. A big surprise dawned on Nigeria this morning as the head of the Eagles Terrorist Group turned in. He dressed as a gentleman, as usual, and parked his car at the front of the headquarters of the State Security Service, Maitama, Abuja. Harrison, the son of Senator Orisayemi, a law-abiding senator, was welcomed by the officers as a law-abiding citizen and a gentleman.
However, it was a big surprise that instead of accepting their welcome salutes, ‘arrest me’ was the speech that burst out of Harrison’s mouth. No sooner had he said this than an officer with the tag code NKOO2 threw the handcuffs around his wrist. ‘I would like to see the Director-General,’ he said. ‘And seeing a press correspondent will be the only condition that will spill the truth out of me’ He promised to confess everything from the beginning of what spurred him to crime commission. To this effect, our correspondent landed at the SSS headquarters in Abuja.” (He stops the reading and sips some water). But... how could Harrison, a coward engage in such a heinous crime, was he really in his right mind when he went to that place?
(He reads on) Some interrogations went on between Harrison and our correspondents.
Correspondent: Mr. Harrison, are you really the head of the notorious terrorist group?
Harrison: You said so.
Correspondent: The nation knows you to be a very easy-going and a law-abiding man just like your father...” (He stops reading) That’s what I wanted to say. He is such an effeminate man. He always ran away from ladies’ screams when we were in the UK. I can vividly remember the day he had a misunderstanding with Susan; how he ran from her just because of threats. This guy is a coward, besides, he has a phobia for firearms. (He hears his stomach rumbling and runs out holding his buttocks. He comes in in a few minutes’ time).
Correspondent: Your action, or shall I say what we know you to be doing, is incongruous with what you claimed to have done. Sorry... are you in a good state of health?
Harrison: (He chuckled) Yes, I am. That your ‘health’ is probably quoted. Perhaps you wanted to say ‘mind’ instead. Anyway, I am in a very sound state of health and I am in my right mind.
Correspondent: Now you’ve irrevocably affirmed that you are the head of the Eagles Terrorists?
Harrison: Yes, I have.
Correspondent: Sorry... I am asking these questions in order to provide detailed and indubitable information for the citizens and to clear any element of doubt in their minds. Now, my next question is: what happened on the podium during...?
Harrison: (He giggles). Are you talking about the World’s Youth Day?
Correspondent: Exactly.
Harrison: It was just an act.
Correspondent: kindly shed more light on that word, “act.”
Harrison: I pretended to have fainted as a result of being agoraphobic so we could use it to defend ourselves in case it happens that the secret of being e sought after insurgent is revealed.
Correspondent: What led you into committing crimes? People usually claim that one engages in criminal activities because of poverty and deprivation. Presumably, you’re living in ‘maggoty’ wea1th. Why did you stick to crimes?
Harrison: That’s what I will say soon. I will tell you everything next time you come here.
Actually, our correspondent left the office without being able to get any piece of information as regards his purpose for engaging in such an act from him. The Director-General of the SSS, however, promised to make him spill all he has in him as soon as the health-section verifies his good state of mind”. (He stops reading and yawns) Seriously, if I were one of the officers there, I would shoot him dead! (He reclines on the three-seater couch, reads for a while, and sleeps. He sleep talks. Idiotic friend.