How to Drive on a Freeway (for idiots)

A freeway, also known as an expressway, a motorway, a parkway, la autopista, or die autobahn, is a controlled access highway. Pedestrians and slow-moving vehicles are typically prohibited on freeways, and direct access intersections are non-existent. 

Entrance and exit ramps are how vehicles access freeways, and parking on the side of a freeway is typically illegal in most jurisdictions.

Anyway, now that I've established what a freeway is, it's time for you to learn the proper techniques for driving on a freeway. Some of the items I list are no-brainers and other tips you may find helpful. 

1. Use the left lane only to pass

There are far too many offenders of this rule that it lacks humor. It doesn't matter if you're driving 20 over the speed limit or 20 under, don't hang out longer than you have to in the left lane. There's no need to drive in the left lane for 20 miles. If you're too lazy to switch lanes, then please stay off the freeway.

2. Maintain a constant speed

Freeway "leapfrog" really chaps my hide. You know what I'm talking about...a car goes flying by you only to slow down to the point shortly after where you have to pass it. And then a bit later, it's passing you again. If you have cruise control, use it. If you don't have cruise control and can't maintain a steady speed, please stay off the freeways.

3. Don't hit your brakes prior to the exit ramp

If you're on a busy freeway and feel the need to hit your brakes a mile before the exit to slow down, you're on my shit list. Most ramps allow you plenty of time to slow down once you've actually exited the freeway. If the weather conditions are bad, then perhaps I'll forgive you for breaking this rule.

4. Don't hang out in another vehicle's blind spot(s)

This is especially true for large trucks, whose drivers likely will have a difficult time seeing you. Also, if a large truck happens to blow a tire while you're along side of it or close behind, you will likely be very sorry. As for a car passing another car, there's no purpose for driving the exact same speed while you pass. Speeding up a little bit is unlikely to cause a crash. 

More to come!