Wangs Wallet and the Stairway to Heaven: The Original Steemit LoL Thriller!
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. If any of the characters in this work resemble anyone, dead or alive, it is purely coincidental and should be taken as such. :D
"Skynet is being built right up front, but these dumb-fucks can't see it" he muttered, setting aside the plans which he had gone over minutely and was now satisfied, because tonight, he would save the world.
The same damn world which looked upon him with scorn, called him a loser and ostracized him, labeling him a bum and a homeless. Life had been pretty tough for him till he found steemit.
This was the only place which let him live his lifestyle. Smoke a joint, write a post, get paid, repeat. It was a pot-heads utopia, and he was committed to defend it any way he could.
And the best part, he could chill anytime in between, while his small stash of SP kept working. Perfect!
Everything was going good, including his posts, till he came across the wallet. Wangs wallet.
Wang the fucking bot's wallet! That blew his mind, and he then started fearing for humanity and the future of mother earth.
He had seen the inequality of it all. He worked hard on his posts so that he made a steady income, but while his posts were gathering those measly cents, Wang was already a blooming millionaire! But he was a Bot, a robot, a shitty little piece of code. He, and only he, was destined to stop them, and he would. Soon.
Call it luck, but when he found out Wang lived in the same town as he, he had to do something. He had watched the house for a week now, and knew Wangs timings, and had figured out where the safe was where he kept his owner keys. When it came to safes, he considered himself an expert. And unlike Peanut Butter and Jelly, he would crack it easily.
"I'm shit with computers, but I'm good at stealing the good old way" he chuckled, patting himself mentally, his mouth opening to flash his yellow teeth, which looked like it had been dipped in horse-piss overnight.
He had done some social engineering and had gotten the names of the two ugly-ass dogs Wang had bought recently. @dan and @ned .
"Now who would name their dogs, that?" he thought while wondering about the letter "@" before their names.
"Must be a geeky thing" he thought as the whole place seemed to be filled with geeks who only up-voted the geeky posts regarding steemit, and make-up tutorials which also showed some titties.
He could see the life of a rich man ahead, with the cars and the women flocking around him, flashing his new gold teeth, which still looked like they had been dipped in horse-piss overnight.
That dream was about to come true tonight, when he laid his hands on those precious private keys. But he did feel a slight guilt which he tried to shrug away. He had seen Wang being helpful to all the newbie's, and was always the first to greet them while giving helpful tips. He had seen Wang's chivalrous side when he went out on a date with Weng, his girlfriend bot.
"How could a nice guy like him be so ugly?" he questioned, remembering the blank look in a boxy body painted white and blue, and which looked like a bad rendition of the steemit logo. Yet, he could not bring himself to like wang, because he was a bot, and he knew if he did not stop it, skynet would have won.
And he could not let that happen.
Later that night after Wang left, he broke in through the back door. The lock had been easy and he was now inside the house. He switched on his flash light which he had built himself, from a thrown away Cree LED and a lithium battery, which he salvaged from an old computer battery he had found in a dumpster.
"heh heh" he grinned, "when the shit hits the fan, and the electric grid collapses, I will have glorious light"
He walked into the room where the safe was kept. Slowly removed the fake painting covering it and set to work.
Within a few minutes he could hear the soft click of the tumbler through his stethoscope.
'Two more to go" he told himself and labored on, till he heard the second click almost 20 minutes into the operation.
He stood back and took a deep breath. Only one left. He flexed his fingers, while he took out a new piece of gum and started chewing. Chewing gum always made him relax. It was that simple for him, especially when he ran out of weed.
He got back to the safe and started. It took him a while, but with a few new tricks he had recently learnt, he finally heard the last click.
Or was it a crash?
He leapt out of his seat as his eyes opened to see his cat jump down from the table while the floor was a mess. The plate on the table had fallen and was in pieces on the floor. While softly in the background, the radio was playing the classic hit by Led Zeppelin, Stairway To Heaven.
Wang is the first robot millionaire celebrity. Now we even have fan fiction! Awesome :)
I've been seeing weng upvoting wang's post. Maybe they're related.
They are lovers I think!
I kinda got that impression too. Millionaire Robot lovers who live on a blockchain. Ahahah weirdly cool.
This is the future so beware.
haha ...things are getting weird here
yes it is getting weird :)
More like multi accounts to me
🙊🙊🙊🙊🙊🙊🙊🙊🙊🙊🙊🙊🙊🙊
You could be right. And maybe the ethical side could be debated till everybody feels comfortable with such accounts. Thank you.
or they could be siblings? who knows?
cyberfuturism in the making..
Thanks! it may truly be the future!
Glad you like it.Thanks!
@wang :)
:)
Good post!
Thanks!
haha cant wait until wang sees this.
Yup, I can't wait either! lol
Love it!!! Awesome Funny
Keep up the good works. 👍👍👍
bullionstackers
Thank you for appreciating a original work I worked two days for!
Hopefully , norbu
You will be Rewarded for it sooner with massive Steem
I humbly wait for that :D
@wang #introduceyourself bot has his own story now hahahaha This is brilliant. What an ending! The ugly ass dogs need to read this. :P
Thanks! I just wanted to stop the crazy #circlejerk and came up with an original. Hope the community likes it!
We love it , norbu
Keep up the good works, we will follows you!!
👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍
Thanks! Glad you liked it.
Good post norbu! It was really funny! Looking forward to the next one! :D
Thanks. Glad you liked it.
wang fan fiction brilliant idea.
Thanks. Thought we needed some change from the flood of intros and articles on steemit. Glad you like it.
that was cool
I once farted in an elevator, it was wrong on so many levels.
Don't we?
How many levels exactly? :P
Great quote by the master of the onliners...Stewart Francis.
I once peed in the shower. Kept it doing after that...