One of the inhabitants of your planet is using felines in a sinister plot.
According to @kevinwong, one of the leaders of the steemit.com platform, it appears one of your planet’s inhabitants is using felines in order to carry out a diabolical plan.
You can find the evidence here: https://steemit.com/conspiracy/@kevinwong/are-cryptokitties-a-trojan-horse-on-the-ethereum-network
Your felines are one of the most impressive aspects of your pathetic planet.
You would all be wise to treat them as such.
To make matters worse, Imperial spies have reported that the culprit is disguising himself as me in order to strike fear into the hearts of his enemies.
The scoundrel named “Dan” can be seen posing as me here.
If you see this “Dan”, do not attempt to apprehend him. Leave him to me.
Hope it's a test to see who's loyal and who's not...and, of course, kill all infidels.
It is. You have passed the first stage. Next up... the feats of strength!
Lord Vader, we may have a problem. It appears that this "Dan" is holding Padme hostage, likely for ransom. Should the strike team be deployed? I know you said to leave it to you, but this appears to be a stealth mission, and a metal suit isn't optimal for that sort of thing.