Smile, life is short

angelo65 (25)in #funny • 7 years ago (edited)

Smile life is short.png
Jokes and more jokes # 1

1.- My love I take flowers.

Even if it was my wake, bring me a tasty hamburger.

2.- Love

Tell me, sweetie.
Have you noticed that you are always with me in bad times?
I think you bring me bad luck, we better finish.

3 .- I am so poor that when I go to the movies, I speak out loud so they can throw me popcorn and so I can eat.

4.- VENEZUELA: Country in the world where you are going to pay the internet and there is no internet in the office where the internet is paid.

5.- What are you doing?

I'm watching a movie.
As it is called?
Killer tarantulas.
What is it about?
Of a giraffe who wants to be a dancer.

6.- One day my neighbor saw me lying in a hammock and told me.
"Laziness is sin"
And I told him:
"And envy too".

7.- The owner of a brothel tells one of her girls: "Go to rooms 1 and 2 place an inflatable doll to each bed ... these two old men are so drunk that they will not notice the difference". The girl ordered it, and the two old men go to their respective rooms and make love to the dolls. Back to their homes, one of the old men says to another:

I think the woman who was with me was dead.
Says the other. Dead? And why do you think that?
It's just that he did not move or talk while we were making love.
The other says: Could be worse, I think mine was a witch.
Witch? And why do you say that?
Well ... what happened was that while I was in the preliminaries I gave him a bite in the ass, and his mother's daughter threw a fart in my face, flew out the window and took my teeth ...

8.- A lady calls the technical internet service: