GIVE SAMMY A JOB - A SHORT STORY ABOUT THE UNEMPLOYED YOUTHS
Mbok have you seen Sammy? Is he heading towards your direction? Please don't tell him that I gossiped about him to you.
Sammy is the Don Juan of our neighbourhood. He chases after every creature in skirts. Young and old, teenager and adult, single and married, widow and divorced, Sammy does not discriminate.
He is so effective. If Sammy starts complimenting you about the beauty of your wife, girlfriend, sister, cousin, colleague etc, you have to immediately issue him a stern warning to steer clear of them because he would definitely make a move on them.
Sammy does not sleep alone at night. Every single night, there is a female sleeping with him in his tiny room.
We wonder how he does it, we believe it is his handsome looks that makes him so irresistible to women. Sammy does not have money, he is a serial debtor. He is a jobless man. Sammy graduated 500 years ago and is still jobless.
"Sammy leave women alone and look for work" we would admonish him. He would laugh and shrug it off.
Sammy hangs around the neighbourhood in the daytime. He plays draft and smokes weed at the local bar. He plays white paper at the betting shop and plays pools at the pool house.
Sammy only talks about women and sex. No matter the topic that is being discussed, when Sammy arrives, he will change it into a sexual discussion.
Sammy is shameless, he narrates all his sexcapades to anybody who cares to listen. He will narrate every minute detail.
If you buy Sammy a bottle of beer, he will give you the latest sex tips and sex styles and tell you how to handle women properly.
A family moved into the neighbourhood recently, a family of six: The husband, wife and four children. One of the four children is a pretty young lady, a tall light complexioned girl with white lovely eyes. All of the young men and randy married men are strategizing on how to get her.
But Sammy made the first move. He approached her at the street corner this morning. He started talking to her...
The next thing we heard was Pam!!! A harsh sound that reverberated around the neighbourhood. The young lady slapped him and was shouting at the top of her voice...
"Stupid jobless man! You have the effrontery to stop me on my way and ask me for sex this early morning! Do I look like a harlot to you? Stupid man! Your mates are preparing for work, you think I haven't heard about you? Don't you ever come close to me again!"
She let out a long hiss and stormed off.
We watched in awe as Don Juan stood speechless with his palm rubbing his right cheek where the slap had been administered. We danced for joy in our homes at the demystification of Sammy. The birds sang sweetly from their nests. The dogs barked happily and wagged their tails, the cocks crowed while the cats mewed at the public humiliation of Sammy the wag.
Sammy walked away head bowed to his room.
A tensed silence descended on the street as we waited to see what would happen next.
30 minutes later, Sammy's door opened and he stepped out. Clad in a French suit and holding a big brown envelope in his right hand.
Hallelujah!!!!
Sammy is going out to look for work!
We screamed and danced with excitement as the man hit the road clutching his CV in the brown envelope.
Mbok if you see Sammy in your area, if he turns up at your office, please give him a job. Give him a job so that all the women in this neighbourhood will be at peace. Give him manual work. Let him cut the grass, let him carry blocks at your building site so that when he returns home everyday, he would be too tired to chase any woman. And mbok wish me well as I set forth to woo the young pretty lady this evening 😁
[All photos extracted from pixabay]